


Don't Walk Out

by thealphagate_archivist



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Action/Adventure, Adult Content, Angst, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-03-10
Updated: 2006-03-10
Packaged: 2019-02-02 12:09:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 23,936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12726360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thealphagate_archivist/pseuds/thealphagate_archivist
Summary: Jack's outrageous behaviour forces a confrontation and Daniel takes extremes measures.  Who is really to blame?





	Don't Walk Out

**Author's Note:**

> Note from the archivists: this story was originally archived at [The Alpha Gate](https://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Alpha_Gate), a Stargate SG-1 archive, which began migration to the AO3 in 2017 when its hosting software, eFiction, was no longer receiving support. To preserve the archive, we began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2017. We e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are this creator and it hasn't transferred to your AO3 account, please contact us using the e-mail address on [The Alpha Gate collection profile](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/thealphagate).

  
Author's notes: Violence, attempted non-con, language and sex.  
  
Thanks to my Beta, Gateroller!  


* * *

"Please Daniel, don't walk out that door."

Daniel's hand hovered over the door handle for a second before with a determined lift of the chin, he reached out and pulled open the door.

"Daniel, please, at least give me a chance, give me time to explain!"

The door slammed shut as Daniel turned back to confront his lover, his face flushed with anger.

"Give you a chance! Give you time! To do what? Insult me, belittle me, despise me and _hurt_ me again. Oh no, Jack, no more chances, no more time. _Your_ time has run out."

Jack's heart froze in his breast. How had it come to this? What had possessed him? He couldn't let this happen; he couldn't allow him to walk out. He knew that if Daniel left now he would never come back.

Jack took a breath, squaring his shoulders. "Do you want me to beg? I will Daniel. I'll do anything you say, anything. Please I'm begging you. Just hear me out."

"Hear what, Jack? Hear your excuses, your reasons why? I don't think so. I don't want to hear you rationalise why you felt it necessary to treat me like that. For someone who says they love me you hurt me with every breath you took. It's too late for begging now Jack. I don't want your kind of love."

Jack listened and knew that everything Daniel said was true. He dropped his chin to his chest knowing he'd lost everything, for what could he really say. _I won't do it anymore?_ It wasn't enough. Daniel deserved someone better than Jack O'Neill.

He lifted his head to face Daniel. He couldn't hide from this. With a breaking heart he said, "Okay Daniel, you're right. There's nothing I can say to make this right. I'm sorrier than you'll ever know but I can't change what I've done, what I am. You better just go."

The pain was overwhelming but Jack embraced it knowing he deserved it and that it would always be his companion now.

Daniel stared back at him, looking both angry and lost before suddenly turning on his heel and walking out of the door, this time pulling it quietly behind him.

Jack stood for a moment staring at the space where Daniel had just been. Suddenly his legs could no longer bear his weight and he slipped gracelessly to the floor. He felt numb, cold through to his bones. His hands shook as they lay limply across his twisted thighs. When the tears finally slid down his face they felt hot against his icy skin. He didn't think he would ever feel warm again. Everything that made him human had just walked out of that door and he had no one to blame but himself.

When Daniel closed the door quietly behind him he'd been unable to move. He still stood on the top step to Jack's house and needing support, he leaned back against the door. The really terrible thing about all this was that he still loved the man inside that house but he knew he could never be with him ever again. It was too painful and he wondered how he would be able to live the rest of his life alone. Once he'd been used to that but falling in love with a whirlwind character like Jack had changed his life forever and there was no going back now. He needed people in his life and the person he needed most of all had, for some inexplicable reason, just spent the last few weeks pushing him as far away as possible and tearing him to pieces in the process.

He realised as he leaned against the door that he'd somehow expected Jack to try and stop him from leaving, to shout and scream or to come after him and that quiet acceptance unnerved him. Even now Jack was being so quiet that Daniel was suddenly afraid. He pressed an ear to the door listening but could hear nothing. Cautiously he peaked in at the narrow window beside the door and saw Jack sitting on the floor in the exact same spot he had been standing as Daniel had left. His head was in his hands and Daniel guessed perhaps he was crying.

Then Jack raised his head from his hands and looked up at the ceiling. Daniel saw the tears running down his face. His blood ran cold then as Jack suddenly let out the most awful wail and his heart slammed in his chest as he realised it was actually _his_ name that Jack was howling. Then he collapsed in a heap cradling his head in his arms.

Daniel's hand reached for the door handle before he suddenly stopped the movement. He closed his eyes tight, his own tears escaping as he did so, then he turned away, hurrying down the steps before crossing the drive to his car. He quickly got in and drove away as if the hounds of hell were on his tail. As he could still hear Jack's wail reverberating around his skull he thought perhaps they were.

* * *

Daniel spent a terrible weekend. It was very early on Saturday morning when he'd run from Jack's house to spend the rest of that day and Sunday on his own. He half-expected Jack to phone or come by but he never did. He wrestled with his own feelings the whole time, knowing he'd done the right thing one minute and wondering if he'd just ruined his life the next.

He'd never been in love before the way he was with Jack. Oh, he'd loved Shar'e, he didn't mean that but the passion he shared with Jack was something altogether different and perhaps that was the trouble. His love for Shar'e had been gentle, both in the giving and the receiving; the sex was warm and passionate but not very adventurous. Not that he'd given it a second thought at the time; it was more in retrospect since he'd begun his relationship with Jack when the older man had taught him so much, not least how to let his body show him the way. Sex with Jack had been something else, exciting, forever different, both of them reaching heights they'd never shared with anyone else. But sex was only part of it; the love they shared was all consuming, passionate and turbulent and, yes sometimes gentle too.

The last ten months had been magical, he'd never been happier but then recently things had begun to change until finally very early on Saturday morning after an horrendous fight he knew he had to end it. It was so hard because he didn't understand what had gone so wrong between them, why Jack's love seemed to have mutated into ... he couldn't even give a name to what Jack seemed to feel for him right now. It was all the more puzzling because Jack claimed to still love him. Daniel had nightmares both nights about what Jack had done and about the look in his eyes and the terrible wail he'd made when Daniel had left him.

He had to fight his own sense of failure, of his guilt for the failure. Yet at his core he knew he'd done nothing wrong, that in truth whatever the problem was, it was Jack's.

He was dreading going into work this Monday morning, knowing he would have to face Jack. He had considered resigning but with his usual stubbornness he'd be damned if he would lose his surrogate family and his job as well as losing the man who should have been the love of his life.

He hadn't come to a decision yet about whether he could stay with SG1, he didn't think he could but he had promised himself he wouldn't decide that until he'd seen just how Jack would behave.

He parked his car in his usual spot but he purposely didn't look around to see if Jack's car was there. It probably was because Jack was invariably in earlier than Daniel. He hurried over to the checkpoint, nodding a greeting and quickly went inside.

It was three hours later that he received the call to go to the Briefing Room, which was odd because they had no mission briefing scheduled for today. When he arrived Sam and Teal'c were already seated but there was no sign of Jack or General Hammond yet. Daniel got coffee and just as he was sitting down the General entered and took his usual seat.

Daniel was surprised when he began speaking without waiting for Jack, though the reason was clear with his first sentence.

"Can any of you tell me why Colonel O'Neill would tender his resignation?"

"What?" asked Sam; she was clearly shocked.

Teal'c raised the ubiquitous eyebrow, which was an answer in itself.

Daniel was too stunned to speak. Whatever he expected Jack to do; it wasn't to resign.

Hammond looked around the table seeing only shocked faces.

"Sir, could it have anything to do with his recent ...behaviour? He has seemed to get ...upset more easily," asked Sam uneasily.

"O'Neill's behaviour only seemed to relate to DanielJackson," Teal'c commented with a glance in the young man's direction. Daniel acknowledged neither the comment nor the look.

"You have no suggestion, Dr. Jackson? I had noticed the ...disagreements between you two recently," Hammond asked quietly.

What the hell could Daniel say? Not the truth but then he couldn't lie either. Sam and Teal'c would see through it, he couldn't lie to them and besides they already knew some of the difficulties between Jack and him, though not about their relationship.

"We did have an argument late Friday but I can assure you I have no idea why he would resign."

"Late Friday you say? An email was received in my office this morning at 0800 hours from the Colonel. He gave no details other than a simple statement of his intent to retire with immediate effect. Apparently the email was timed to be delivered this morning but it was sent just after noon on Saturday."

Daniel bowed his head. He never wanted this, he didn't want to take Jack's life from him and he knew just how much working with the SGC meant to his lover.

Hammond watched the three remaining members of the SG1. He saw the look that passed between Sam and Teal'c as Daniel bent his head, obviously upset by this occurrence. Whatever was going on it was clear they believed that if anyone knew it was Daniel.

"I think I need to have a private talk Dr. Jackson. Major Carter, Teal'c you are dismissed."

They weren't happy but they could do little more than nod and glance at Daniel who never raised his head.

"Come my office, son," the General said in a soft voice.

Daniel rose and followed the General, wondering what the hell he could say. Would it matter if he told the truth now? Jack was no longer in the military so the 'don't ask don't tell' rule no longer applied. Except he'd resigned in despair and what if he wanted to return when ...when this mess was over?

Hammond watched the young man as he took his seat across the desk. Hammond wasn't as blind or as naïve as some of his command liked to assume. He hadn't spent as many years as he had in the military without seeing _everything_ at least twice. He had a pretty good idea of the relationship between Daniel and his C.O. and he turned a blind eye to it. The day it interfered with their duty would be different, then he'd have to intervene. He'd been a little concerned about the colonel but his attitude didn't affect either man's work so he'd just decided to keep a close eye on them. However, whatever had happened over this last weekend changed all that.

"Dr. Jackson, Daniel, we have to talk. I have been trying to contact Jack from the moment I read his message but his home phone is disconnected and his cell phone is out of order. Even his email account no longer exists. I've already sent a car to his house but it is closed up. A neighbour said he saw him leave with a suitcase sometime early Saturday afternoon. He doesn't want to be found son and that isn't acceptable."

Daniel's face paled as the General was talking and for someone who knew Daniel as well as Hammond, the pain in the young man's eyes was obvious.

"Daniel, let me tell you something. I have never asked and Jack has never told but that doesn't mean to say I don't know."

Daniel's mouth dropped open in shock. "But, how? We. What?"

The General smiled gently. "Daniel, you and Jack were extremely discreet but to people who know you well, as friends, as family..."

"Are you suggesting that Sam and Teal'c also know?" he asked.

"Neither Major Carter nor I could mention the subject and certainly Teal'c has never said anything. I have no idea if they've guessed but I wouldn't be surprised."

"Oh, god..." Daniel dropped his head into his hands. As if he needed anything else to go wrong. In that moment he had the sudden urge to scream but all he could do was straighten up and face the General.

"Daniel, that doesn't matter for now. I don't wish to pry but I need to find Jack. Is there anything you can tell me?"

"About where he might have gone? Other than the obvious, his cabin, no," he answered wearily.

"I'm not asking for details but you were having relationship problems. Daniel, you know Jack's behaviour of late has raised some questions but every test Dr. Fraiser performed was clear."

"Tests? What tests?"

"He didn't tell you?" Hammond was surprised.

"No. I knew people had ...noticed but I thought they just put it down to our usual ...situation," he finished lamely.

"Daniel, there was nothing usual about his attitude to you. I spoke to him about it once and the doctor was concerned enough to ask for check-up tests."

"I see. Everything was clear you said."

"Yes."

"And you spoke to him? But...how could you. I thought you couldn't ask."

"Daniel, I spoke to him about his behaviour as an officer with a member of his team."

"Ah."

"He apologised and said he would be more careful in future. From what you're _not_ saying now I assume he was simply more careful in front of me," Hammond said with a sigh. "Daniel, I appreciate this is hard for you to talk about but this goes beyond the personal now. Can you tell me if you know of any reason why he would resign? I know in the briefing you said no, is that still true?"

Daniel took a deep breath before answering. There was no way he could tell the General everything. "We'd been having ...major problems and late Friday, well Saturday morning actually, I...," his voice broke and he stopped to gather himself. He swallowed, "I walked away. He...took it hard. I...I."

General Hammond watched Daniel trying to get a grip on himself and knew that whatever had gone wrong between the men, Daniel still cared. He guessed the fact that Jack did too and that was the reason he'd gone away.

"Did you expect to see him here today?" the older man asked gently.

"Of course, I had no idea...it never even occurred to me that he might resign. He loves this job. I ...oh god, George, where the hell could he be?"

* * *

Jack stood on the promontory looking across the valley. It was a beautiful sight but this bright morning it left him cold. He'd not felt warm, physically or emotionally since Daniel had left and he doubted he ever would again. He turned back to the cabin a little ways behind him and for a moment he saw Daniel standing on the veranda watching him but then the mirage disappeared and he was alone as ever. The vision brought back to him the memory of when he'd seen Daniel watching him just like that and what had followed. Daniel had waved to him calling that lunch was ready. It hadn't been anything special, just soup and sandwiches but what followed lunch; now that _had_ been special. They had made love, slow and languorous, exploring each other as if they had all the time in the world. They thought they had then, the rest of their lives together. They knew it would be difficult, they'd already spent nearly a year keeping their relationship secret but they were both strong, stubborn men and they would fight for each other.

That wonderful time had been four months ago. _What the hell has happened, what's gone wrong? What's gone wrong with me? How could I have done *that*?_

_I never stopped loving him. I still love him and I always will. Danny doesn't understand what happened and neither the *fuck* do I!_

Somehow now that the boiling anger that was his constant companion was dissipating he could think more clearly. He'd spent the last few days going over and over what had gone wrong and he could now roughly pin down when it had started.

_It had been, what, almost three weeks ago now. We'd not long since returned from PX4 765 after a rather disastrous mission. Everyone was kinda pissed 'cause it was supposed to be a simple mission, though when the hell had we ever actually had one of those. A simple meet, greet and talk the natives into letting us mine for trinium. It had started out well, Daniel smiling and talking up a storm and before we knew it we were all invited to a welcome party later. Carter was taken to where she believed the best samples were to be found with Teal'c to keep an eye on her and Jack had stayed with Daniel while he made nice with the tribal elders._

_Carter came back as happy as Larry; even Teal'c was wearing a small smile. Things were going great. No one, not even Daniel, knew what had gone wrong but about half-way through the celebration the Shaman, some sort of witchdoctor, jumped to his feet and started yelling about the anger of the deity. The four of us were grabbed before we had chance to react._

_Daniel tried to get information but the tribal elders would no longer speak with him. We were separated and each taken to a hut where they tied us to a post. Later that same night we were each visited by the Shaman, accompanied by two other natives, and forced to drink a thick liquid that tasted of fruit while the Shaman chanted over us. The drink made us all feel queasy and kinda drunk. Just after sun up the next morning we were taken back to the Stargate, told the Shaman had cleansed us of our taint and we were ordered to leave with an admonition from one the tribal elders never to return under pain of death._

_We were all still feeling somewhat the worse for wear, totally puzzled and I simply ordered us back home to see Doc Fraiser pretty damn quick._

_We were given very thorough examinations and Doc Fraiser said we were all pretty normal for people with hangovers; except for the blood test which showed up an enzyme that shouldn't be there and was upsetting our systems. However it was already showing signs of breaking down. Doc Fraiser kept us in the infirmary for twenty-four hours and follow-up tests taken at regular intervals showed the enzyme was dissipating, though at a different rate in each of us which apparently wasn't a problem as that was due to our differing metabolisms. We were ordered to stay on base for a further twenty-four hours and by then our tests were clear and we felt perfectly normal. It was written off as an inexplicable failure and forgotten._

Even now Jack couldn't really accept that mission had anything to do with the breakdown of his relationship with Daniel but it was about then everything began to change.

* * *

Three days had passed and Hammond was no nearer finding Jack. All the obvious places had been checked and double-checked. His house was still abandoned; he hadn't been in touch with his parents or any other family members. His cabin in Minnesota hadn't been occupied in a while. There had been a large cash withdrawal from his bank account on that Saturday afternoon and he hadn't used his credit cards since the previous Thursday. One thing Jack knew, as an ex-Special Ops officer, was how to cover his tracks.

Daniel left Hammond's office and retreated to his own. The General had told Daniel privately that he wasn't going to simply roll over and accept the resignation. He was going to force the colonel back to talk with him. It was true, of course, that if Jack insisted Hammond would have no choice but to accept the resignation but he was entitled to question the decision within the confines of his office if only on the basis of the good relationship he had with his second-in-command. First he had to find the man and that was looking more and more unlikely and Daniel was becoming more desperate.

Sitting behind his desk Daniel tried again to think what could have possibly destroyed what he'd once believed would be the final relationship of his life. They'd promised each other just that and he'd never doubted the truth of it. For either of them. Then suddenly things had begun to go wrong.

Small things at first, nuances of Daniel's character that Jack had always ignored or in some cases found amusing, now niggled at him. He began to snap at Daniel and at first Daniel had put it down to stress at work. Then he became dismissive of Daniel's feelings. Jack would be late for dinner or other appointments and instead of his usual good-natured apology he wouldn't say anything to excuse himself, no explanation, no apology. After the third time this happened, Daniel asked him what was going on and Jack's reply had been a snarled _I don't have to explain myself to you!_ Daniel had been stunned both by the tone and the comment and he'd walked out of the restaurant.

Things had deteriorated swiftly after that, both in private and at work.

The slightest mistake Daniel might make, or on occasion ones that Jack _decided_ he'd made, and Jack would tear into him. At first he only did this at home, which was bad enough but then he did it in public when they were off duty. Daniel did his best to try and soothe things over or if that failed he'd yell back but how on earth could he do that when Jack finally began to treat him the same way at the Mountain. Oh it was known that Daniel didn't take any shit from Jack but he never had out and out slanging matches with the man, he couldn't undermine his authority like that.

The put downs got worse and Jack never seemed to care that it hurt him. Of course, Daniel had tried to talk to him; at first Jack wouldn't admit there was anything wrong. Then Jack would get mad again and he'd tell him something like _can it! You got what you deserved!_

Not surprisingly their physical relationship suffered. Even after a blazing row Jack would still expect Daniel to have sex, he never called it _making love_ any more and if Daniel refused because he was upset or angry, then Jack would accuse him of being repressed, even of being frigid. A couple of occasions when Daniel had agreed, thinking perhaps he could break through during or after sex, Jack had been particularly rough with him. Not that they hadn't always enjoyed the odd bit of rough sex but on those occasions it seemed that Jack didn't care if Daniel enjoyed it, his only concern being his own gratification.

Daniel had seriously considered breaking off the relationship then but he hadn't, needing to believe that Jack, _his_ Jack was still in there somewhere.

Daniel tried to persuade Jack to see someone assuming that he was having some sort of psychological problem but that only started another almighty fight with Jack accusing him of _being the one obviously in need of help because I'm perfectly all right!_

Daniel was hurting so much, not physically but emotionally. The man he loved and _god deep inside still believed_ , loved him was tearing his heart out and stomping on it. He didn't know how much longer he could keep taking this pain; keep taking this punishment when he knew he didn't deserve it, or where it was coming from. He was afraid that eventually Jack would destroy the love they shared and it was killing him.

Daniel sat on the couch in the corner of his office, his memories finally bringing him to the previous Friday night/Saturday morning when he'd come to the conclusion that he'd have to end the relationship.

Daniel had invited Jack to his apartment for yet one more attempt to persuade him he needed some help. Jack had refused to go to Daniel's but invited the young man to his house instead.

They'd shared pizza and beer together and when Jack's mood didn't seem so bad so Daniel began to talk. He'd hardly said more than a couple of words when Jack grabbed him and kissed him hard, forcing his lips apart to invade his mouth. This wasn't unusual or entirely unwanted, alpha Jack could be fun and exciting. They were soon rolling naked on the carpet in the living room and at first it was great. It wasn't long however before Daniel realised this was more than just alpha Jack, as he wouldn't allow Daniel any freedom of movement to reciprocate.

Jack used his weight to pin his lover face down and with one hand pinned Daniel's arms, stretched above his head. He began murmuring to Daniel, telling him to behave, that he knew he liked it like this. Then using a knee he began forcing Daniel's legs apart as the young man tried to get Jack to let him up.

Jack ignored him and using his free hand pushed at Daniel's buttocks, separating them as he attempted to line up his cock for entry. Daniel yelled at him stop, he didn't want it, not like this, never like this. Jack had never, never treated him like this before. Normally just the slightest comment from either of them, just a simple no, was all that was ever needed. This time Jack not only ignored him he told him to _shut up!_

Daniel was totally unprepared and he'd not been penetrated for a couple of weeks as the only sex he'd allowed Jack recently had been of the sucking, rubbing or masturbation variety as Jack's attitude didn't exactly make Daniel feel inclined for the kind intimacy penetration meant to him. Jack obviously wanted more and wasn't prepared to take no for an answer any longer. Daniel was afraid, for the first time in all the years he'd known him, Daniel was afraid of Jack O'Neill as he felt the man's cock press at his anus. Daniel actually wondered who this man was lying over him because he would never have believed the man he loved could act like this. As Jack began to breach him, Daniel gasped at the shock of pain and with a strength he didn't know he possessed, he reared up and threw Jack off.

He stood there in a blazing fury poised to fight, his chest heaving and his heart pounding. Jack rolled to his knees looking up at him with a fire in his eyes before getting to his feet and facing Daniel. As he watched, Jack seemed to weaken and he flopped into the armchair just behind him.

Daniel couldn't remember exactly what was said next other than it degenerating into another stupendous argument. He didn't remember them getting dressed either but the next thing he clearly remembered was heading for the door and out of Jack's life. He'd sacrificed his pride to stay with Jack but he wouldn't allow the man to abuse his body. His heart was broken but he wouldn't let Jack trample on his soul. He would walk away with the memory of what had once been and would try to forget what had replaced it.

As he replayed the scene in his mind it suddenly struck him that something was wrong. The more he thought about it the more Jack's behaviour in the early hours of Saturday when Daniel was finally about to leave, had been out of character with his recent behaviour. He hadn't railed at him which would have been his usual behaviour of late, he hadn't even really tried to talk him out of leaving, not after the first minute or two and even that hadn't been _anger_ it had been _remorse. God he'd begged,_ Daniel recalled now with a sick feeling to his stomach _and when I refused he'd simply accepted it, apologised and accepted it. What the hell was going on?_ He'd been too angry and upset then to really see it.

The behaviour was out of recent character but wasn't it more like he used to be? Yes and No. Yes in that there was no irrational anger aimed at Daniel, No because he allowed Daniel to leave him.

Was it a turning point?

No longer able to sit, Daniel resorted to pacing. He _had_ to find Jack and all the obvious places had been covered and checked. Jack wanted to be lost. _God, why Jack?_ He had to be ill, or something. And had been perhaps since all this started. Whatever caused it, made him stop pacing. _How did I miss it? God I've been blind._

_Damn I have to find you; I have to be sure. If there's a chance for us, I'm gonna take it._

Wait. Was it possible the Yes and No aspect was still at work? Did he really want to be missing from his home, from his job, from his life? _From me?_ Did he run because he saw no other choice? Could he have run to something?

_Where can you have gone?_ That phrase rattled around his brain for hours, desperation was driving Daniel to despair.

Finally, like a light bulb going on, Daniel wondered if Jack could have gone to the last place they'd really been happy. One place that no one else knew about. He decided not to tell anyone about his idea; if he was correct he wanted to speak to Jack first, on his own. If he were wrong then it wouldn't matter.

* * *

As he made the long drive through the mountains, Daniel let his mind drift back to the wonderful holiday at the cabin on the promontory where he and Jack had spent a week of bliss not long before things had started to turn bad. It was a place no one else knew of, Daniel had found it on the net, a real little hide-away. It had been perfect, just as advertised and it was there they promised they'd share their future whatever it took. They'd been together about nine months by then but it had been so difficult. Too many hard missions, too long away from each other as lovers and together too much as team members who had to keep their feelings bottled up. There were some missions when Daniel wasn't even on Jack's team. Those difficult times had brought one fact home to both of them, no matter how hard it was they wanted to be together. They would find a way to keep going while they served the SGC and when that eventually ended they would still be together. Neither of them voiced the fact that they could die on one of those missions, they both knew it and saying it aloud would only make it more real. They promised each other more weeks of peace like this one before returning to the SGC.

The memory only made what had followed recently more impossible.

Finally, just as evening was drawing in, Daniel turned the last bend of the winding trail to the cabin, praying that his trip wasn't in vain. When he saw Jack's truck parked alongside the veranda Daniel gasped out the breath he hadn't realised he was holding.

Jack heard the sound of a car engine and a feeling of dread overtook him. He walked out onto the veranda and almost as if he'd been expecting him, Daniel's car drove up and parked. Jack's first reaction was how wonderful it was to see him, his second reaction was, "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Jack," Daniel's voice was a whisper, he could hardly believe he was talking to him again. "I needed to know you were all right, I had to see you."

Jack had moved down to the base of the steps and halted. "Now you've seen me you can leave. You've done it once, you can do it again." It was the last thing he wanted but he had to make Daniel leave, he no longer trusted himself around Daniel and the terrible thing was he didn't understand why.

Daniel felt as if someone had taken his heart and squeezed it. He swallowed and approaching a little closer said, "Not till you tell me why."

"Why what?" Jack asked belligerently.

"Why you stopped loving me?" Daniel asked softly moving a little closer still.

Jack's reply was instant, his shock visible. "I never stopped loving you! You left me you bastard!"

"Isn't that what you wanted?" Instinct told Daniel to keep his voice gentle.

"No!"

"Then why?" he asked in little more than a whisper.

"I don't know." Jack sounded lost.

"There has to be something else happening here, Jack."

Jack looked at Daniel, now standing only a few feet away and a churning began in Jack's stomach. "I've been trying to think," his hands began to feel sweaty, "when I ...began to ...change..." Jack was gritting his teeth.

Daniel could see and hear the change in Jack. "What is it? What's going on with you?"

Jack didn't answer but he moved away from Daniel, pacing in front of the veranda on the far side of the steps from where Daniel was standing, watching. Jack was trying to control himself. Fighting to control anger that was building inside, anger for which he knew there was no reason. No reason? That can't be, there has to be a reason. It's not me; it's not. I have no anger for Daniel. I don't.

"I don't!" Jack yelled.

"Don't what?" Daniel asked starting to approach.

"NO! Stay back where you are."

"God, Jack. What the hell is going on?" Daniel frowned for a moment. "You know something, don't you?"

Jack stood still, trying to control his breathing. He put out an arm; hand out palm forward as if pushing Daniel back. "Stay there, please?"

Daniel nodded and waited, stomach tense and heart beating fast against his ribs.

"I've done a lot of thinking these last few days. Up here, on my own it was easier somehow. I think maybe... You remember PX4 765?"

Daniel frowned as for once the number escaped him.

"They grabbed us during dinner, tied us up and forced the awful gunk down our throats?"

"Of course."

"It... I started being different not long after I think." Jack expression asked for confirmation.

Daniel stared at him for a minute and then his eyebrows raised and his mouth dropped open a little. "Are you saying you think you may have been affected some how? Damn, I knew there had to be something!"

Jack closed his eyes when he heard Daniel say that. _He still had some faith in me. God knows I don't deserve it but whoever allowed Daniel Jackson into my life, I thank you._

"You think it was whatever they gave us? But why would it only affect you like this?"

"I don't know. I don't even know if I'm right."

Daniel made as if to take a step closer.

"No! Keep back. I can feel it rising in me, the anger ...irrational. I wasn't like this till you came."

"Me? It has something to do with me?" Daniel sounded incredulous.

"You don't believe me?"

"Actually I do. As crazy as it sounds, it's the only thing that makes sense," a ghost of a smile crossed his lips, "in a weird way."

"You believe me? I wondered if I was simply going crazy."

"You never told me General Hammond had spoken to you or that Janet Fraiser made you take more tests. Other people noticed, Jack, noticed you only behaved that way with me. If it was you just "going crazy", he commented, making air quotes around the words, "wouldn't you have been the same with everyone. It was just me, Jack."

Daniel paced up and down but made sure he moved no closer to Jack. "I've been doing a lot of thinking too. It was all I could do so I wouldn't go crazy when you disappeared like that. You know what I suddenly realised? That morning when I ...walked out on you, at the end after that blazing row, when I was actually going, you were different."

"Different?"

"The anger was gone, you were just sorry, remember? You had never apologised to me once in the last couple of weeks. You even told me to go, because that was right for me. In the last couple of weeks all you'd cared about was what was right for _you_. Different Jack, you see?"

"Different," he smiled quickly but just as quickly it faded. "If I am different then why is the anger here now? I can feel it, crawling inside my stomach."

"I don't know. You said it began when I got near. It must have something to do with proximity."

"But I was farther away from you than this and was still furious with you, before I mean."

"You haven't felt this way at all since I left you?"

"No," Jack said sadly.

"Whatever it is it must still be in your system. Presumably it will increase the longer we..." he waved his hand between them.

"Those bastards, it had to be them. Why? Why would they do this to me, to us?"

"I don't know but I'm damned if we're gonna let them win. Come back Jack, let Janet have a look at you, at us. Please?"

"We keep apart."

"If that's the way it has to be, then yes. We just drive our own cars back to the SGC and I'll go in first and warn the General. Okay?"

Jack nodded; hope flaring for the first time.

* * *

Daniel looked once again in his rear view mirror to check that Jack was still following. It wasn't that he doubted Jack would keep his promise; it was more for his own peace of mind. They were approximately half way back to Cheyenne Mountain and Daniel pulled his cell phone from his jacket pocket and dialled General Hammond's number.

"Hammond," the General said briskly.

"Sir," before Daniel could say anything else the General interrupted.

"Dr. Jackson, where are you?" he snapped. "It was bad enough when Colonel O'Neill disappeared and now you pull this vanishing act!"

"I'm sorry that I didn't inform you of my intent but I had a sudden inspiration about where Jack might have gone to."

"And why couldn't you just say so?"

"Because I wanted to speak to him on my own first, General, to try and get him to see reason and come back with me."

"All things considered, maybe you're the last person who should've gone after him, Dr. Jackson."

Daniel sighed, acknowledging the barb. "Sir, I'm bringing him back with me. He needs to see Janet Fraiser."

"You've got him, well done," he hesitated. "Why Dr. Fraiser?" Hammond's puzzlement carried clearly down the line.

"Jack and I had a long talk and it was quite civilised providing we were at least ten metres apart!"

"Pardon?"

"Sir, whatever is wrong is somehow linked with my proximity. You know he only ever behaved this way with me and he said he was in much better control of himself when he was on his own. He told me he was able to think clearly and try to understand what was going on but once I arrived that began to change."

"Your proximity? That sounds very odd. Wait a minute, are you suggesting that this ...situation has been ...engineered somehow?"

"Yes, General and Jack believed it could have something to do with what happened to us on PX4 765 and I tend to agree. We need to be tested both of us, sir, together and separately."

"You're on your way back now, you say? Wait, I thought you couldn't be too close to him."

"No, sir. We're each driving our own vehicles. I'll get there first and come and explain to you in more detail. Jack will wait up top until you call him down. I would suggest either he goes straight to your office and I'll wait in the Infirmary or vice versa, whichever you decide."

"Very well, Doctor. I'll apprise Dr. Fraiser."

* * *

Jack walked along the corridors towards the Infirmary with General Hammond at his side. The General was very understanding about his situation thanks mostly, Jack thought, to Daniel's intervention. Hammond was still not one hundred percent convinced of his theory but he was more than willing to put it to the test.

The trouble was that Jack was afraid of the consequences if he was right because he didn't believe that Fraiser would be able to do anything about it. She'd insisted his team take regular tests immediately following the debacle on the planet and in his particular case because of his uncharacteristic behaviour later, she had insisted on repeated tests. Nothing had shown up. He remembered one day, after he'd been particularly cutting to Daniel in her hearing, the Doc had ordered him to the Infirmary for tests and even though he'd pulled delaying tactics it couldn't have been more than an a couple of hours later and still she'd found nothing wrong. Why should it be any different this time?

The General had telephoned ahead to warn Fraiser that they were on their way so that Daniel wouldn't be there when he arrived. It was with something of a shock when they walked into the Infirmary and Daniel was there waiting with the Doc.

Jack stopped in the doorway and nervously asked, "What on earth is he doing here?"

"Daniel has explained your idea, Colonel O'Neill and he told me in a fair amount of detail what happened up the cabin." She moved a little nearer to Jack and continued in a soft voice, "He also told me something of the situation between the two of you away from the SGC."

Daniel had already told Jack that Hammond had long since guessed about their relationship but had chosen to turn a blind eye. Apparently Daniel had now told the CMO and Jack wondered if she would be willing to keep it out of his records. Jack glanced over at Daniel, a question in his eyes. He wondered exactly how much Daniel had told the Doc.

He was still unable to think of that last night they'd spent together without the cold chill of horror rippling down his spine. It was his worst nightmare come to life and he would never be able to forget the sick feeling of power washing over him as he'd held Daniel at his mercy. He still didn't know if Daniel would ever be able to forgive him for that even if the younger man did understand it hadn't really been him as he was under some kind of outside influence. Daniel might believe that desire was buried somewhere deep inside Jack and if he did, how could Daniel ever trust him again. Jack knew it wasn't true but how could he ever convince the archaeologist of that.

Looking at the young man across the room Jack decided that if, _please god, when,_ this was finally over, if Daniel could no longer trust him as a lover he would do his best to at least regain the friendship they had once shared. It wouldn't be what he really wanted but if it was all Daniel would allow he would accept it gratefully. He needed Daniel in his life in whatever capacity.

Daniel suddenly flashed a brilliant smile at Jack and that was enough for Jack to believe that he'd kept _that_ sordid episode a secret for which he was more grateful than he would ever be able to tell his young friend and perhaps it even meant that Daniel had forgiven him.

Unaware of the undercurrent between the two men Janet went on, "I understand your desire to keep a distance from Daniel but I need to take samples of blood from both of you when you are together and this ...change in your mood occurs and also when you are apart."

"Both of us?" Jack asked with a frown.

"Yes, if it really is caused by Daniel's proximity to you it could just as easily be something in his system reacting to something in yours. I don't really know what is going on, or even if your idea has any merit."

Daniel moved forward as if to speak and Janet interrupted, "I know Daniel, you believe it does and I'm not saying you're wrong but I need some empirical evidence."

"What exactly do you want them to do, Doctor?" Hammond asked.

"I want to take blood at regular intervals. I'll take some now, leave them alone together under observation and if things do progress as they expect I will want to take blood then too. Then they will be separated and I'll take a further sample and again later when it becomes clear the Colonel has calmed down. See what that turns up."

"If anything," the General said quietly.

* * *

Sam heard that Daniel had brought the Colonel in and that for reasons unknown even to the rampant rumour mill of the SGC they were both being kept in the Infirmary. She visited Teal'c in his quarters and together they quickly made their way down to see Janet.

They went directly to her office but she wasn't there and as they were leaving they saw Lieutenant Amanda Porter hurrying past.

"Mandy," Sam called to the nurse, "where's Doc Fraiser."

"Isolation room," she answered absently.

"Isolation? That can't be for them, surely? Why would they be in Isolation?" Sam frowned up at her tall companion.

"We shall go and investigate," he answered.

They turned back along the corridor and opened the door in the observation room overlooking the Isolation Lab below. Janet was seated at the console set against the viewing window, the computer was running at her left elbow and the flickering picture caught Sam's eye and she gasped at what it held.

Jack was pacing back and forth not unlike a caged animal and in one corner watching him sat Daniel Jackson. He had his knees pulled up in front of him, his arms looping them, left hand gripping his right arm just below the elbow. The tension in the posture was clear to any observer. At Daniel's request, in an effort to maintain their privacy, audio reception of Jack's voice was muted but it was clear it was much louder in the room below as he punched the air for emphasis and swung back to yell something at Daniel whose wince was clearly visible. The young man did not reply, merely sitting and watching.

"Janet?" the gasped question from Sam earned a comforting hand on her arm from Teal'c as Doc Fraiser turned to look at the other half of SG1. "What the hell is going on?"

"It's all right Sam, this is at their request. I was going to call you two in soon anyway. I need some check bloods from you as well."

"Check bloods for what, Dr. Fraiser?" Teal'c questioned.

"And what on earth do you mean at _their_ request? Why the Iso Lab and why is poor Daniel having to put up with that?" she asked waving her arm in the direction of the obviously angry Colonel.

As they watched, Jack suddenly switched from verbal abuse to stomp over toward Daniel and reach down towards the young man. Janet was up and out of the chair but Teal'c was already moving.

Daniel had been in the Iso Lab with Jack for almost ninety minutes. They'd only been in there about twenty minutes before it was clear that Jack was losing his battle for control of his emotions. At first it had just been snide comments, then hurtful jibes and insults. Daniel had stood up for himself at the beginning just as he would in any such normal instance, trying to keep his reactions as accurate as possible. Things progressed until it was pointless arguing back; Jack was not really reacting to anything Daniel said he was simply ranting. His comments had no particular relevance, almost plucked from any disagreement or divergent point of view they'd ever had.

By this time Daniel had retreated to a corner of the room, sitting down and hugging his knees in a defensive pose. He didn't realise at first what he'd done but when he did notice he didn't move as he thought it might make Jack feel less threatened. The way he was ranting and raving, accusing Daniel of everything from disregarding his orders in the field to flaunting his disrespectful opinions of his fellow team-members in the commissary, it seemed the most sensible approach. Daniel was well aware they were being watched and he was in no danger but he'd never under-estimated Jack O'Neill and he wasn't about to start now.

Jack had turned the conversation to their personal relationship, belittling the importance of Daniel's feelings and denying his own.

"You don't really think I ever actually loved _you_ , do you? I mean why would I? You're such a weak man. You let them take your wife from you for god's sake; then again maybe she wasn't so much _taken_ as she leapt at the chance to _escape_ from you."

Daniel closed his eyes for a moment at the pain of those words. Even though he knew the real Jack would never say anything remotely like that to him, to hear that cruelty coming from Jack's lips was like a knife to his heart. He filled his internal vision with memories of Jack smiling at him, Jack coming closer to seek a kiss, the look on the older man's face at the point of orgasm, anything to block out the twisted visage of the man he loved as he berated and insulted him.

As he opened his eyes again it was to see Jack halt his pacing and turn back towards him.

"You'd have thought after all I tried to teach you about pleasing me that at least some of it would've stuck, that someone as intelligent as you would have learned _something_. But no, not you. I gave you the biggest turn on of your life, god you screamed loud enough to be heard at the mountain! Me, what do I get? A damp squib that's all. Maybe it's time for another lesson, one you won't forget this time."

Daniel wondered then if he hadn't made a major mistake crouching in a corner, trapping himself at the mercy of an irrationally angry man when Jack finally lost it and stalked towards him, rage snapping in his usually welcoming gaze.

Bracing to defend himself as long as it took for help to arrive, Daniel began to climb to his feet at the same time as Jack reached for him and Jack latched onto Daniel's upper arms even as the Iso Lab door opened. His attention entirely on Daniel, Jack never even looked behind him, something the experienced colonel would never have done. Teal'c reached Jack before he had chance to do anything other than tighten his grip on Daniel who on seeing Teal'c enter, with Sam and Janet close on his heels, didn't attempt to fight off Jack. Instead he waited for Teal'c to act and watched as the tall alien grabbed Jack around the shoulders and pulled him back forcing the colonel to relinquish his hold on the archaeologist.

Jack did so but not without a struggle. "Let go of me you bastard, he's mine. He's mine!"

As Teal'c firmly held the struggling man Janet quickly plunged a syringe into his hip as Sam helped hold the colonel as still as they could.

"What the hell do you think you're doing? Release me at once, I'm ordering you to release me!"

"I'm sorry colonel but not yet. Daniel, wait outside." Dr. Fraiser instructed. Sam also let go of the colonel and hurried out with a clearly upset Daniel. "Try to concentrate, sir. Don't you remember, we're trying to control whatever is going on with you and Daniel?"

Obviously the colonel was in no state to listen to the doctor just then and with a quick nod at Teal'c she backed out of the Iso Lab. Teal'c gave Jack a sharp push so he staggered and had to grab something to keep his balance and when he looked back he was alone in the locked room.

* * *

Daniel retreated to a chair in the observation room, sitting with his back to the viewing window from where Sam was watching the scene unfolding below. Janet and Teal'c came in a moment later and, with a quick glance through the window at the colonel once again pacing below, Janet walked over to Daniel.

"I have his blood sample Daniel, I just need yours now," she said quietly. Silently, Daniel held out his arm for the doctor to take the sample and even as she did so there was the distant sound of metal striking metal.

"O'Neill has just thrown a tray at the storage trolley," Teal'c reported.

"Will someone please explain what on earth is happening?" Sam asked, staring at Daniel obviously expecting the explanation to come from him.

One glance at Daniel was enough to tell Fraiser that this was one of those few times the linguist couldn't string two words together so she took Sam and Teal'c to the far side of the observation room and, as succinctly as she could, explained what was happening. Sam's eyebrows beat Teal'c's for elevation as she heard the colonel's theory, not because she doubted it but because she was impressed by his line of reasoning in what was obviously a very difficult time for her CO.

"What's next Janet?" asked Sam.

"Allow the colonel to calm down and in a few hours I'll take further samples and then one more twenty four hours after the first sample I took on their return. That should give me a clear picture, providing of course there is something to see."

"What shall I do, Janet?" Daniel asked forlornly.

"Rest, Daniel. You're exhausted. Take one of the VIP suites and try to sleep."

"Not sure I can."

"At least lie down and rest. I'll be along in a few hours."

* * *

"Well doctor?" asked Hammond as Dr. Fraiser took her seat at the Briefing Room table where Daniel, Sam and Teal'c were already waiting for her report.

"I have just sent the colonel to one of the VIP suites. I suggested he rest as he spent quite a large proportion of the last few hours pacing. It took approximately four hours after Dr. Jackson left the Isolation Lab before he returned to what both he and I agreed was a more normal frame of mind. Shortly before he left I took the final sample and I also took one from Dr. Jackson.

"I have already received the report on the first samples taken when they returned and the two samples taken while they were in the Iso Lab. It looks as if the colonel was correct. The first sample from Dr. Jackson appeared normal but the colonel's did show a very small proportion of that unknown enzyme. The second test sample and the first one taken in the Iso Lab showed a slight increase in the colonel's reading and the first showing of it in Daniel. The second sample taken in the Lab at the time of the colonel's extreme reaction showed a very high level of this enzyme in the colonel and a lesser but significant amount in Daniel's blood."

"Wait a moment, doctor. If they both have this enzyme to some degree why isn't Dr. Jackson behaving as ...irrationally as Colonel O'Neill is?" asked Hammond.

"That's what puzzled me, sir. I'm afraid I was less than thorough when SG1 returned from PX4 765. I found traces of the enzyme in each of them and as it was dissipating and they seemed unaffected I didn't investigate further, for which I must apologise. I have had these samples looked at with a fine tooth comb and I have discovered that the though the enzyme appears identical it is not. There is a minute deviation in each sample at the molecular level, including those I took from Sam and Teal'c, though those two _are_ identical. Further investigation is being carried out but preliminary results suggest ... well the simplest explanation is that the changes correlate to the action of opposing magnetic fields."

Hammond frowned, not understanding.

"They attract each other but any contact is catastrophic," Sam explained.

* * *

Daniel was in his office trying to work on a translation for SG7 but it was proving very difficult; not the translation but his ability to concentrate. Jack was still relegated to the VIP suite until Dr. Fraiser could produce a report once she got all the test results back. There was certainly no suggestion of an easy solution, in fact the general consensus seemed to be that a 'cure' might not be forthcoming. The very fact that the enzyme causing the problem was completely outside the realm of Earth medical science didn't bode well. There was always the possibility of contacting one or all of their allies but as that had not always proven useful in the past no one was holding their breath.

Trying once more to keep his mind on his work Daniel turned back to photographs of the strange writing that had been found on the outside of the temple on PR9 322. This kind of unusual script would normally keep Daniel happily busy for days but at the moment it was simply proving to be an annoying distraction.

Jack was pacing around the room he was presently occupying and growing more frustrated with each step. The TV was merrily making noise in the background but it was completely unable to hold his attention. He walked the few steps across the room and into the bathroom where he walked to the vanity unit and stared at his reflection in the mirror wondering if it was really _him_ staring back or whether it was the other personality who seemed to have taken up residence inside his head. With a swift shake of his head he turned back and retraced his steps until he reached the foot of the bed when he changed direction and walked to the door of the room. He didn't bother opening it, he'd promised General Hammond he would stay inside until he was summoned and didn't particularly want to find out if his CO trusted him enough not to post a guard outside the door.

He spun on his heel and made for the bed where he promptly plopped down on it. He so needed to see Daniel right now but he was the one person who couldn't be seen. _Damn!_

His glance fell on the telephone next to the bed. There was nothing to say he couldn't telephone the man after all, enzymes couldn't travel down phone lines now could they? Now the seed of the idea had been sown he couldn't get it out of his head. He had this urge, this _need_ to hear Daniel's voice, to hear his friend, to hear the man he loved say he was forgiven.

He picked up the receiver and dialled Daniel's office; the usual place to find the archaeologist and he didn't think it'd be any different this day. He wouldn't be surprised if Daniel was sitting staring at the wall though. No one knew the archaeologist better than Jack and his reputation for hard work was well deserved but Jack also knew that even his beloved work was beyond him at times of extreme stress and he clung to the belief that Daniel still wanted a relationship with him and that he would be as worried as Jack while awaiting for the results.

Daniel's reverie was interrupted by the shrill clamour of the telephone and irritably he picked up the receiver. "Jackson."

"Hi, Daniel," Jack's said in an uncharacteristically quiet voice.

"Jack," the pleasure in Daniel's voice was palpable. "How are you?"

"I'm fine." Daniel imagined he could see the sparkle in Jack's eyes as he delivered Daniel's classic reply.

"Hah! Now the truth."

"Climbing the walls then but I am mostly worried about you," Jack replied softly.

"I admit this waiting isn't easy."

There was a pause and Daniel knew Jack well enough to understand that he was about to hear the real reason for the call.

"Daniel, how are we really? Our ...friendship means a lot to me and I don't want to lose it."

Daniel noted the hesitation in the question and realised the need for caution. There were cameras all over the base and though Daniel didn't know for certain but it would be logical that there would be provision to listen into phone calls for security reasons.

"We're okay, Jack," he answered quietly but firmly. "Our friendship means a lot to me too and I couldn't understand what was going on. I'm so glad we now have some proof that what happened wasn't really your fault.

"I was so worried. That last ...disagreement we had, it scared me...I hope you know I didn't ...I wouldn't,"

Daniel interrupted, "Jack, please stop. I know that wasn't really you and I'm angry at myself for ever believing you would ...behave like that."

"I think you had plenty of reasons to believe just that."

"Okay but I should have known something else was going on. You would never ...say such things to me."

"You forgive me?" Jack's whispered, his question full of emotion.

"Oh, Jack!" Daniel was unable to say what he really wanted, or what Jack clearly needed to hear. Instead with an audible sigh he simply said, "Always."

Jack closed his eyes grateful that Daniel's trust in the nature of man allowed him to forgive so easily. Jack wasn't sure he deserved such simple faith.

The sound of a knock at Daniel's door was clearly heard down the phone line.

"Just a minute, Jack."

Jack could hear low voices and then as if Daniel was moving back towards the phone as he spoke, the young man's voice became louder, "I know, I'm speaking to Jack now so I'll ask him to meet us there."

"Jack, Sam's here. The General wants us to report to the Briefing Room right away."

"Together? At the same time? Is that wise?"

Sam's voice drifted to him, "Sir, Janet has a suggestion and wants us all there. Will you keep as far away from Daniel as you can and Teal'c will keep an eye on you just to be sure? According to Janet it was at least fifteen minutes before you really showed signs of altered behaviour when you and Daniel were in the Iso Lab. Teal'c is on his way to your room as we speak."

* * *

When Jack arrived in the Briefing Room everyone else was already seated around the table, Daniel on the far side with the General at his usual place at the head of the table on his left and Janet seated on his right. Sam was sitting opposite Daniel so the General was sitting on her right.

Jack halted just inside the room and scanned the occupants, his gaze falling on Daniel with a slight smile. Daniel's return smile lit up his whole face and warmed Jack's heart. Jack moved forward and took hold of one of the chairs at that end of the long table and pulled it back towards the entrance and sat down there. Teal'c raised an eyebrow but pulled back a chair too and sat beside the colonel.

"Well people, we have a major problem and we need to find a solution," General Hammond began. "Do you gentleman have anything to report?" he asked glancing between Daniel and Jack.

"Nothing you don't already know, sir," Daniel said.

"I doubt that anything has changed but it's too soon, yet," Jack said with a glance at the clock and Hammond was surprised to realise that he missed the irreverent tone of voice that was such a part of Jack O'Neill.

"Well, doctor we're hoping you can give us something positive," Hammond said turning to Fraiser.

"I wish it were that simple," she replied, her glance taking in everyone in the room and lingering a little longer on the colonel. "The test results confirm the colonel's supposition. When I took bloods from Colonel O'Neill and Dr. Jackson in what was essentially the 'control' condition, both results appeared normal. The results taken at the time of the greatest stress were simply loaded with the enzyme, though as I've already reported there is a small but vital difference between the configurations of the enzyme in each man. I believe without the interaction of the compound in Daniel's blood, the colonel would not have reacted as he did."

"So it's definitely both of us then?" Daniel said nodding to himself.

"Yes, and as suspected the check bloods taken a couple of hours later were clear again."

"All right, you proved the theory. Can you do anything about it?" Jack asked, his tone suggesting he already knew the answer.

"At the moment, I'm afraid not. We've got a long way to go before we know enough about this enzyme to even be able to know if we _can_ do anything. I'm sorry, gentleman but this is such an unknown quantity."

"So that just leaves the bastards who originally gave it to us doesn't it then?" Jack commented.

"If I remember correctly, you were told not to return under the threat of death," said Hammond.

"Yes, sir, that's true. However, I can't speak for Jack, though I doubt if he will disagree," Daniel glanced at Jack who held his gaze, "but I have no wish, no more than that, I _will_ not live like this. I want my life back, my friend back. I want to go out on missions with my team and if we bicker it'll be because we want to. I want to enjoy team nights and Friday night pizza and hockey with my friend. I don't want to have to sit two rooms apart and only be able to talk by telephone. I want to be able to ..." Daniel's voice faded as he'd been about to give his friends and the base commander way too much information.

Jack continued as if it were he who was speaking, "I want to be able to talk to my friend and look into his eyes; I want to be able to laugh with him or argue with him about whether to switch over the channel to watch some boring documentary on the style of Greek pottery. I even want to bitch because he's decided it's time to call in the favour that I owe him and drag me off to visit a museum on a Sunday afternoon.

"I simply want to be who I am and share my life with whomever I want. What the hell gives some person, some society on another planet half a galaxy away, the right to take away the privilege of choice from my life?"

Daniel wasn't the only person around that table who was looking at Jack with a slightly open mouth. Jack O'Neill was not known for his ability to talk when he could let someone do it for him; he certainly wasn't known for eloquence.

"I couldn't have put that better myself, Jack," Daniel said softly. "Please, sir let us go back. We can't go on like this."

"I understand what you're both saying but there's no way you can go on your own so you are asking me to put others at risk with you. I can only consider that if,"

"Sir," Jack interrupted. "I _need_ to leave."

"Jack?" Daniel asked, beginning to rise.

"I wasn't talking to you!" he snapped.

Teal'c laid a hand on his arm and Jack jumped in reaction to the touch which was enough to drag him back for a moment. He took a deep breath. "Sir, I need to go, NOW."

"Of course. Teal'c will you escort him please?"

After the colonel had left, Hammond turned to Dr. Fraiser and asked her if there was something she could do to help Jack control his irrational temper.

"The colonel has no control over his actions in proximity to Daniel as long as that enzyme exists. We have to do something."

"Janet, would any kind of tranquilizer or something like that help to at least control his moods in the short term?"

"Possibly but I suspect he would need a high dose which, besides making him drowsy and obviously create yet another problem, it couldn't be sustained for too long. It would be just too dangerous."

"Yeah, I know the damned things are just too addictive. General, please at least let us try. Even if you ignore our personal feelings on this, if we can't solve the problem, you're going to need either a new archaeologist or a new team leader for SG1."

* * *

Sam knocked on the door to the VIP suite and when Teal'c opened it he gave a small nod of his head as he let her in.

Jack lay on the bed staring at the ceiling, his expression far away. Sam glanced at Teal'c and he gave an imperceptible shake of the head.

Sam was pretty sure that neither the colonel nor Daniel had any idea that she and Teal'c had known for months about their relationship. Oh, she understood why they kept it secret, especially the colonel but it was a shame all the same that they didn't feel that she and Teal'c could be trusted. Teal'c was a little more pragmatic. He said it wasn't their feelings they ought to be concerned with but the two men themselves. O'Neill would recognise the need to keep it secret within the military hierarchy and to tell her would not be doing Sam any favours. Of course she was paraphrasing the way Teal'c had said that but he had mentioned things like honour and duty and protection. It meant the same.

She supposed it could also be that they were concerned about how she and Teal'c might react to the relationship. She had seen how things were fairly early on, not that it was obvious; it was just that she knew them both so well. They had always been close even when they'd just been friends; they bickered like an old married couple. Perhaps that was it, it had always been there and finally even they had realised it. She smiled to herself. They had built in protection and never even realised it 'cause everyone was so used to their bickering and byplay they'd never see the difference.

She and Teal'c had discussed it when it became apparent that they both saw the same thing. As far as Teal'c was concerned it simply was; he didn't have an opinion either way; he said what would it matter what he or anyone else thought. The relationship existed and they were two intelligent men who knew the risks and consequences and the fact that they continued with the relationship merely proved that to them it was worth it. If it meant that much to them, then as their friend it was worth it to him too. Sam was a little in awe of such simple straightforward logic but she had to admit it wasn't that easy for her. She had been somewhat shocked when she first understood what it was that was nagging her about her two team-mates but when she got over that and looked at the situation honestly she suddenly realised it seemed ...it felt right. They had always been together because that was how they were meant to be.

She had never understood the stupid 'don't ask, don't tell' mentality though she did understand the fraternisation rule and when she asked Teal'c his opinion, he said O'Neill had always treated DanielJackson differently because that was his duty, as it was theirs and he didn't expect that to change. He did say if he saw anything that was detrimental to the team dynamic he would not hesitate to mention it to O'Neill. She accepted the sense of that and in all the months since, the colonel had never acted any differently than he had in the last four years.

Teal'c lowered his head and drew her attention back to the here and now. She gave him a sheepish smile of acknowledgement and moved toward the bed.

"Colonel, the General sent me to inform you that after further discussion with Daniel and Dr. Fraiser he has agreed to approve a follow-up mission to PX4 765."

As she was speaking Jack's attention shifted from the ceiling over his head and he pulled himself into a sitting position.

"Details, Carter," he said sharply.

With a swiftly hidden smile she was pleased that the colonel was back. They would need him for this mission, _Jack_ would need him.

"We are to return to the planet with SG5 in support. It has been suggested that your ...bursts of unrestrained anger may be at least partially controlled with the help of a tranquilizer. That being the case, the general has agreed that Doc Fraiser will accompany us."

"Doc Fraiser, why?"

"This was her suggestion. Apparently she insists on monitoring you because you will need a sufficient dose to calm you while keeping you mobile and to do that she needs to use a specific drug, one that can become addictive all too quickly. It's not one she would normally use but in this situation it's either that or we carry you through on a stretcher."

"Crap!"

"Yes, sir," she said with a grin.

"So, SG5 and the Doc. Anything else?" Jack asked.

"Err, Daniel was quite adamant sir, that he's not going to take no for an answer on this one. If we can't get them to fix whatever they did with that drink they forced on us, he..."

"Go on, Major," for the first time Jack smiled.

"He said and I quote, we should swipe the damned stuff."

"That's my Dannyboy," Jack whispered under his breath.

* * *

Daniel stepped through the event horizon; his eyes on Jack just a couple of metres in front of him with Teal'c and Doc Fraiser bracketing him. The Doc had given Jack an injection just before they stepped through the wormhole. She hadn't given him a particularly large dose but she wasn't letting him out of her sight.

Sam was alongside Daniel offering support in the only way she could at this time. SG5 had come through first and had formed a loose guard around the Stargate platform in case any natives showed up.

The first time they had visited this world it was obvious the Stargate was rarely visited, as the surrounding area was overgrown. It wasn't until they were halfway to the village that they first encountered the indigenous population. Daniel already knew what to expect from the MALP and UAV information that had been sent back but as yet they had little to go on as far as language was concerned. There were no writings by the Gate, which at least suggested it wasn't a Goa'uld planet, they couldn't resist announcing themselves and all their glory. There was also no sign of any Asgard influence, any runic symbols or icons evident.

The village had only been seen from a distance by the UAV but it suggested a fairly rudimentary settlement, the buildings simple in line and construction. Daniel said it reminded him of an early European settlement in layout except that the building dimensions were odd and the doorways slightly lower in height than might be expected.

The truth became clear when they finally saw the inhabitants; they were humanoid but there were not human. The average height appeared to be just a little short of 1.5 metres and their appendages were short and stubby. However the most obvious differences were in their facial features, all of which were small, even in relation to their shorter stature. Eyes and ears were particularly noticeable. The eyes were centrally set in the face, equidistant but reminiscent of a child's eyes set in an adult face. The ears were even worse, looking little more than an extended flap of skin with no sign of the exterior whirl of the human ear.

Daniel had expected a major communication problem but after a few minutes of talking, pointing and gesticulating the apparently primitive natives could understand him and reply if a little brokenly at first. His fascination went unanswered as no one seemed to understand why it seemed odd to their visitors. The mission was off to a flying start, the natives being welcoming and the possibility of trade high.

Later Daniel had obvious cause to regret his earlier confidence because the first night ended disastrously and they still didn't know the reason, though more recently Daniel believed he might have a good idea. It was something he'd have liked to discuss with Jack but at the moment that was difficult. They'd had a couple of more telephone conversations while the final arrangements were being made for their return to PX4 765 but of necessity, they had been rather shorter and less personal than either of them would have liked. Also his idea for the reason behind their 'punishment' was not something he could broadcast at the SCG. He still didn't know whether the phone line in his office or Jack's VIP room was bugged but he couldn't any chances.

Jack was aware of Daniel's eyes on his back. He'd always had this uncanny connection to Daniel even before they'd begun a relationship and it had become stronger since. It was as if he always knew if the young man was watching him, he sometimes felt he even knew when Danny was _thinking_ about him. He resisted the urge to turn and look at the younger man; in some way he was afraid now of that very connection that he'd always valued so much before. Could it be the very kind of thing this ...whatever it was, was zooming in on. He knew it sounded far-fetched but then so was this whole situation. There was something in his blood, in their blood that affected them both without them even touching each other. They could stand metres apart and still it would affect his behaviour in relation to Daniel. Fraiser had used the analogy of opposing magnetic fields to describe the effect to him; that sounded no less off-the-wall than this.

"Are you all right, colonel?" Fraiser asked.

"Just thinking," he answered distractedly.

"As I asked, are you all right, sir?" she repeated with a grin.

"Very funny, *Major*," he replied, emphasising her rank, something he never normally mentioned.

"Seriously, sir, how are you holding up? I've only given you a small dose to begin with and I expect you to let me know immediately you feel any change begin. You clearly felt something in the briefing room."

"Yeah, it's like a crawling sensation in my stomach and then a faint tingling begins. I was never aware of any physical ...reaction before Doc; this means it is getting stronger doesn't it?"

"It does seem to have been gradually increasing in your system since they gave it to you. I've been thinking about it and I have an idea that perhaps it is pushing you more and more because you are still in close proximity to ...well let's just say the opposition and I guess by now you shouldn't be."

"So it will just keep getting stronger; until what? One day my anger becomes so great I don't just yell or attack him, instead I want to kill him?"

"I can't say for certain but the pressure is increasing. If we can't get them to change whatever they've done..."

"I'll resign and go live in the wilds of Northern Minnesota," Jack interrupted with a grin but it never reached his eyes and Janet could tell he was hurting.

She'd known about Daniel and the colonel almost from the beginning. They were careful about their physical relationship so that whenever physicals were due there was no sign of penetration, and of course post-mission physicals were no problem as they abstained from any sexual activities off-world. However, she saw too much when one of them was ill or hurt not to understand just how close they were to each other and no matter how careful they were there were signs a good doctor could not miss. Her suspicions were confirmed one night about nine months earlier when Daniel had been badly hurt and as the colonel had kept his usual vigil, insisting on sleeping on the hard plastic chair at the side of Daniel's bed. She'd gone to check on Daniel in the early hours expecting the colonel to have fallen asleep as he had so many times before but instead she'd heard his whispered voice as she quietly approached. He was begging Daniel to come back to him, telling the unconscious man that he couldn't bear to lose the other half of his soul.

She would never forget the emotion in the man's voice as he said, "I need you to make me whole, I need you to make me live, I need you to make me love. Dammit, I need _you_."

She realised the man sitting in that chair was not the colonel she knew and she suspected only the man lying in the bed really knew _this_ man. She also knew she didn't belong in their secret world so she tip-toed back to her office and waited ten minutes before going back into the ward, ensuring if the colonel was still awake he would hear her coming this time.

Sam disturbed Janet's memories.

"Sir," Carter said approaching and leaving Daniel still standing on the platform watching. "Everyone is ready to move out if you are."

"Okay campers," he said trying to sound as if everything was normal. "Let's make tracks, Teal'c, you take point. Major Lawrence, deploy SG5 on our perimeter."

"Yes, sir." Lawrence used hand signals to spread his team around SG1. He knew it was very much the responsibility of him and his team on this mission to keep the others safe while they concentrated on sorting out this confusing mess. The colonel's report had made it clear that the natives on this planet were fairly primitive but they did carry short spears and knives. Apparently Dr. Jackson had said it was surprising they didn't appear to have developed the bow and arrow. Personally he was grateful, close quarter fighting might be dirty but at least you knew from where the threat was coming, you could damned well see it!

Daniel watched as Teal'c walked on ahead with Jack and Janet Fraiser not far behind. Sam had dropped back to walk with him. She hadn't said much to him, probably because she didn't know what to say but just her presence was a comfort. He knew this whole mission was going to be terribly difficult, not just physically and mentally as usual but this time emotionally. It was all too close to home. He also had the fear of what Jack might do if the natives wouldn't help. Even when not under some damned alien influence, Jack could be volatile, especially concerning something as important to him as this. He was under no illusions about how much Jack really did love him. As much as he wanted things back to normal, wanted the joy of loving and being loved by Jack, he couldn't take his own contentment at the cost of others. He was quite prepared to beg, steal or borrow what they needed but beyond that...

They continued to walk on in silence, each one preoccupied with their own thoughts. Daniel estimated they must be about halfway to the village when the first natives appeared; a couple in front and a few others scattered about in a rough semi-circle.

Teal'c immediately halted, his staff weapon held carefully but with the appearance of not actually threatening the natives. Jack also held his weapon away from his body, prepared but in no way hostile. Lawrence was carefully watching the colonel for his lead.

Sam kept her weapon across her body, her finger on the trigger, as she made her way forward alongside Daniel, whose weapon was still firmly clasped in his holster.

The natives' weapons had also been loosely held until they saw who it was that approached them. Before Daniel could speak one of them yelled at a compatriot at the edge of the semi-circle of natives and he ran off in the direction of the village, obviously to summon the tribal elders, or even the Shaman.

Daniel attempted to soothe the villagers, telling them that he and his friends meant no harm that they had only come to talk. However, the natives merely stared back at him and refused to speak.

Janet had noticed the colonel was becoming agitated and twice he'd opened his mouth to speak but had snapped it shut instead.

"Colonel?" she asked.

"Yep, Doc. I think..."

She quickly opened the small case she was carrying over her shoulder and took out a pre-filled syringe and injected the contents in Jack's arm.

One of the natives saw the movement and indicated vigorously, jabbering something at the apparent leader of the band.

"See, see! What other magic do they have?"

Daniel quickly glanced back at Jack and saw Janet refastening her supply case. His lips thinned and he turned back, attempting to reassure the natives that what they saw was no threat.

"It is only a medicine, a remedy to help cure an illness. It's not magic."

Lieutenant Barber's voice suddenly carried across the clearing, "More natives approaching, sir!"

Major Lawrence commanded, "Heads up but no action without my direct order."

Jack looked over to the approaching natives and immediately recognised the elders but he couldn't see the Shaman and didn't know whether to feel annoyed or relieved. He wondered if that was just his own confusion or was the drug working already?

The elders went directly to Daniel and spoke sharply to him, to the accompaniment of raised spears and chanting.

"How dare you return? You were warned your lives would be forfeit if you ever came here again."

The chanting natives moved forward threateningly.

"Stop!" Daniel said commandingly. "This time we are armed and we will not hesitate to protect ourselves." In the background Lawrence and his men loudly cocked their weapons.

The leader of the original band seemed to take exception to that and surged forward, the point of his spear aimed directly at Daniel's stomach. Sam immediately swung her weapon to block the man's action and behind her Jack lifted his weapon into the air and fired a quick burst. The blast of sound filling the air shocked the natives and most of them jumped back. A couple of braver souls, or perhaps they were just foolhardy, used the confusion to attempt to move on Major Lawrence's position. When he turned his weapon in their general direction and fired past them to blast the trunk of a tree a short distance away, they rapidly changed their minds and retreated.

The elder, eying Daniel's still empty hands, cautiously moved forward and carefully asked, "Why have you come back, what do you want?"

Daniel continued in a much calmer voice. "We have not come here to hurt anyone; we are no threat to you. We have come for your help." He took a breath, he really wanted to yell and demand but instead he had to be polite and diplomatic. _Shit!_ He closed his eyes and gathered himself. He opened them slowly and smiled calmly at the native scrutinising him. He began again, "We know you did something to us, particularly to the colonel and me. We want you to reverse or remove whatever you did."

"That cannot be. The Shaman decreed you were tainted and the taint has been removed. It cannot be replaced."

"I demand we speak to the Shaman," Jack declared.

"It is not..."

"Don't dare tell me it's not possible!" Jack interrupted furious. "You...he has ruined my life. You will damned well take us to him now!"

"Jack, please?"

"Colonel?

"Daniel, just get us some help." All his furious energy dissipated and now he just sounded weary.

* * *

The drug was clearly working to slow down his responses. Jack was walking carefully, again with Teal'c on one side and Doc Fraiser on the other. He didn't like being this far out of the loop, leaving decisions that should be his to Daniel, Teal'c, Carter, even Major Lawrence but he also accepted he had no option. They were already in the village environs, Daniel having persuaded the elders to take them to the Shaman. Of course the obvious superiority of their weapons certainly didn't harm his argument; not that Daniel would use it, that wasn't his style. Usually.

Jack knew his mind was wandering but he didn't seem to be able to do anything about it. He should be more concerned, he knew it but he also knew he could rely on his friends to keep it together. Speaking of his friends, where was Daniel? Oh, there he was going into that hut. _Oh not without me Dannyboy._

Teal'c obviously had the same idea and guided Jack towards the large hut as he glanced at the diminutive doctor who, on catching his eye, shrugged.

"He'll be all right, just not shuffling with a full deck at the moment," she said.

Teal'c's eyebrow rose almost to his non-existent hairline. "Another Tau'ri maxim?"

"Oh, Teal'c honey, don't try the innocent routine with me. I know you watch Oprah and Springer, there ain't nothing you don't know!"

Inside the large hut the Shaman was already sitting on a slightly raised platform before a huge fire pit. The fire was pile of smoking embers but it was still very warm. The elders led the way in and moved to sit in a semi-circle around the Shaman who had clearly been warned of the arrival of the strangers. He was already chanting, the words familiar to Daniel from their previous visit. He glanced over at Jack who, head on one side was also listening to the chanting.

Suddenly nervous, Daniel snapped, "Teal'c!" Besides attracting the Jaffa's attention it distracted Jack, whose eyes tracked to Daniel immediately. Daniel's eyes switched to hold Teal'c's and speaking in Goa'uld he said, "Keep his attention off the Shaman. I'm not sure if his words affect us but just in case."

Teal'c nodded and began to talk quietly to the colonel and to Doc Fraiser who then also joined in the conversation.

Daniel, with Sam in attendance, moved closer and sat down opposite the Shaman and the elders. Teal'c and Janet brought Jack to sit down just behind the Daniel.

SG5 had taken up its position outside guarding the entrance, keeping other natives out and SG1 and the doctor protected.

"Shaman," Daniel spoke calmly and clearly cutting across the chanting. "As I am sure you've already been told we have come back..."

Lithely the Shaman got his feet interrupting Daniel with a shake of the large rattle in his left hand. "I have been told of your audacity in returning here and you bring force to uphold your sacrilege."

"Sacrilege? We mean no sacrilege. How can we when we don't even know for what you've punished us? As for the force, what choice did we have? We had to come back here so you could undo what has been done to us. They are for our protection only."

"Yes, I have heard this but I could not believe I heard aright. You wish me to commit sacrilege also? To reinstate a taint I have removed? Even if I could do such a thing I would not."

"Taint! What is this taint you keep going on about?" Jack demanded.

Teal'c and Janet had ceased their conversation with Jack once the Shaman had stopped his chanting but even so his outburst was a surprise to them.

Daniel glanced back but though Jack seemed upset he still looked in control.

"That was going to be my next question," Daniel said quietly on turning back to the Shaman.

"It would seem the Osala did not work to destroy your taint in any case," the Shaman said with a frown, "else he could not still be here with _you_." The last word was said with distaste.

"Osala?" Daniel asked, ignoring the rest. "Is that what you gave us to drink?"

"The drink of the deity to cure the evil of the taint. It has never failed before."

"There ya go with the taint again," Jack said sharply. "For fuck's sake Daniel, get to the damned point!"

"All right Jack, all right."

"Perhaps it did not entirely fail," the Shaman said with a sly grin.

"Bastard!" Jack yelled almost rising before falling back to his seat. His eyes looked lost. "Janet? I..."

"Okay, Jack, in a while. Daniel, I shouldn't give him any more just yet. Do something."

"He can do nothing, woman," the Shaman gloated. Picking up a large gourd and holding it high, he said, "The Osala will take it from him; it is the will of the deity." He chanted a few words, with which the Elders joined.

"Damn you!" declared Janet. "You've no right to do this to them and why? These two men have been friends for years and this is destroying them..."

The Shaman interrupted. "Friends? They are not _friends_. Theirs is an unnatural relationship; it is obscene. "

"Obscene?" Daniel was so infuriated he didn't even consider his words. "How can you describe love as obscene? It is the best possible expression of feeling one can experience for another. And how can you call it unnatural? Love comes in many forms and each one is as valid as the next."

"Such _expressions_ ," the Shaman spat out the word, "should not exist between two of the same gender. Such _love_ is false, evil. It cannot be allowed to continue."

"Love is a rich emotion given to us to make our lives meaningful. When it is given and received in good faith how can it be anything _but_ wonderful? These are two of the most honourable men I have ever met and their love is true," Sam declared.

Daniel turned to look at Sam hardly believing what he'd heard and a warmth spread through him at her expression, belatedly realising that she knew, she'd _always_ known.

"Only in the eyes of evil men can love be evil! You are the tainted ones, not these two men," Teal'c intoned.

Daniel looked at his friend and felt a fool for not realising that they would see and they would understand. He gave a small nod of acknowledgement to Teal'c before turning to the Shaman again. He took a breath to calm his temper.

"How did you know? I'm sure we said or did nothing to ...indicate our ...relationship."

"We knew almost as soon as we met that you were an emotional people and that you were very close but that was good. Then when you separated the feelings we sensed from you two were so very strong."

Janet frowned and glanced up, "Sensed?" she asked. "You could _feel_ their feelings for each other, is that what you're saying?"

"Of course," he seemed puzzled by her question. "It was then my duty as Shaman to delve deeper expecting the suspicion was incorrect. Imagine my horror to discover it was not, to find such ...such _feelings_ for _each other_." He shook his rattle as if to clear a miasma.

Daniel was stunned; he'd never expected this. It also gave him his answer; no way would these people help. Just then there was a commotion behind and he glanced towards Janet who was attempting to quieten Jack.

"It's all right Jack, it's all right," Janet was saying quietly to Jack who was leaning against her and shaking.

"Janet?" whispered Daniel.

"That chanting seems to have upset him," she said. Daniel didn't say anything but he understood; he'd felt a pressure inside his own head while the Shaman had chanted. "He needs more, he can't fight it any longer," she continued quietly. "I can give him another injection but it will put him out."

"Do it," Daniel said firmly.

She raised an eyebrow but when he nodded she opened her case and took out a syringe. "Leave it to us, sir, we'll look after you."

"I know, look after Daniel too," Jack said wearily. This was the last thing he wanted but he also knew it was necessary. He'd been fighting the anger ever since they came through the gate. The injections did help but he could feel the anger gnawing at his insides fighting to get out and he knew eventually he would lose. It was a risk he couldn't, he wouldn't take.

"You can be sure," Teal'c said. Jack nodded at Teal'c even as Janet slid the needle home.

A shout of triumph filled the air and the Shaman laughed. "See, you tamper with the justice of our punishment but you fail. You will never prevail against the deity. Your taint has been removed and you cannot change it."

He began to chant again, his voice growing louder and louder, the cadence of it taking on a sing-song effect until the elders joined in, swelling the sound to fill the large hut.

Daniel's head began to throb in time with the sound and this time he couldn't control it, clamping his hands over his ears but the sound continued inside his head. Sam tried to help him, who by now, was moaning. Teal'c recognised something of what was happening and leaving Jack to the tender care of Janet, he jumped up and onto the platform. Teal'c reached down and ripped the gourd from the tight grip of the Shaman who merely looked at him then closed his eyes and continued chanting. Teal'c had been glad when he felt the weight of the gourd and heard the sloshing of it contents.

There should be plenty of this Osala inside for the doctor to investigate. He leapt off the platform and pushed the gourd into Doc Fraiser's willing hands before bending to pick up the now unconscious O'Neill.

Sam already had Daniel moving towards the entrance, his gait unsteady.

"Major Lawrence," she called and the major stuck his head into the entrance.

"I thought it sounded as if things weren't going so well," he said in a loud voice to counter the still rising chanting. Upon seeing Teal'c carrying the colonel he asked, "Is he all right?"

"Just out cold, Major. We've gotta get back to the Stargate ASAP. I'm not too sure whether these guys will try and stop us," Sam said as Lieutenant Barber took Daniel's weight from her.

"What's with Dr. Jackson?" Major Lawrence asked.

"It's that damn chanting. It's somehow affecting whatever they've done to him. The sooner we get him away from here the better."

"Right," he replied and signalling his men to take point, he took the six as SG1 hurried for the gate.

* * *

Sam had her arm around Daniel's waist as they made their way out of the village environs. The villagers were all heading at a run in the opposite direction towards the large hut from where the sound of chanting could clearly be heard. Jack was slung over Teal'c's shoulder as the tall figure moved swiftly ahead. Janet was staying close to Jack. Lawrence and the rest of SG5 were running alongside forming a tight perimeter. Now was not the time to get separated.

As they ran for the trees Daniel pulled away from Sam in a stumbling run.

"Daniel?"

"It's all right, I'm okay. The farther I get away from that damned chanting the better." While this was true, Daniel was not being exactly honest. He did feel better but he was by no means fine. He could still hear ...or was that feel...the sound reverberating inside his skull. He couldn't afford to be distracted. He glanced at Jack thinking that at least, being unconscious, he wasn't being affected by the chanting, as he was pretty sure it would have affected his friend even more than it did him. If it irritated Daniel it was likely to drive Jack to distraction.

For a moment everything went quiet as the chanting stopped. Then the air was full of shouting and the sound of spears banging against shields before once again the chanting rose in crescendo making Daniel feel as if someone was pounding inside his skull. Then the sound settled down to an annoying background hum.

"They're coming!" Lawrence yelled.

"Major Lawrence?" Daniel called moving to meet the major as he jogged nearer. "Don't kill them, major. Their beliefs might not be ours but you don't kill a man because he thinks differently than you do."

"Don't worry Doc; I have no intention of killing anyone. Just try to keep them at bay if we can but I warn you if it comes to a choice between us and them, I choose us."

Knowing that was the answer Jack would have given, Daniel just nodded and Lawrence ran back to his position, shouting as he went. "Keep it above their heads, lads!"

Daniel steeled himself and moved quickly forward towards the Jaffa. "Teal'c, give Jack to me. You'll need both hands to fire your staff weapon."

Teal'c looked at him with a slight frown. "Are you sure you are well enough, DanielJackson?"

"Yes I'm feeling better. I'm fine now. I can carry him." The archaeologist could hardly tell Teal'c he'd carried Jack over his shoulder before. That time he'd been laughing as Daniel had grabbed him off the living room sofa slung him over his shoulder and climbed the stairs to his bedroom. The warmth of the memory slid over him bolstering his reserves.

"His proximity does not make you uncomfortable?" Teal'c said as he slipped the colonel onto Daniel's broad shoulders.

"No, it was always the other way round and whilst Jack is out he should be okay too. Let's just get back home with the stuff," he nodded at the gourd in Janet's hand.

"Janet, you stay close to Daniel and we'll watch your backs. SG5 can watch the perimeter," ordered Sam hefting her weapon.

Janet was carrying a handgun, as was Daniel. They both took them out but their priority was to get Jack to the Gate.

The natives were milling around the rear of the small column but the random bursts from the P90s and Teal'c's staff was keeping them back. Every so often one of the natives, bolstered perhaps by religious fervour or the need to prove himself a warrior, would surge forward and throw his spear. Mostly they were too far back to get a good trajectory with the short spears they carried but one got near enough to be hastily swept aside by Lieutenant Barber and another thudded in the ground too near to Janet for her comfort. Major Lawrence took careful aim and fired a few rounds into the ground right in front of the foremost natives and that cooled their ardour for a few minutes.

By this time they were three-quarters of the way back to the Gate and Daniel was flagging but he stubbornly kept going. Teal'c had noticed and moved closer to protect his friends. The natives were still crowding close by, intent on their quarry but their teeth had obviously been pulled and they knew it.

Then the Shaman appeared on the edge of the crowd. He began his chanting again and this time the entire crowd joined in and before long the sing-song chanting filled the air. For everyone but Daniel it was just an annoying sound, a distraction they didn't want. For Daniel the sound was tearing his nerves to shreds. He desperately tried to hold himself together, knowing he did not have far to travel carrying his precious burden. He managed to move about three steps before the Shaman hit his crescendo and the note tore into his head like a spike being driven in. Daniel fell like he'd been pole axed. Jack rolled off his shoulders but didn't stir.

Teal'c ran over and knelt beside Daniel who was holding his head between his hands and rolling from side to side.

"DanielJackson!"

Janet had gone to check on Jack and when she saw he was still out, she turned to Daniel. "Daniel? Daniel, speak to me. DANIEL!"

His eyes opened slowly, still squinting with pain. "J'n't," he mumbled. "J'ck?"

"He's all right. Teal'c will take care of him."

"O'Neill is safe," Teal'c added.

"H'me," Daniel pleaded, squeezing his eyes shut again.

"Damn! I wish he wasn't surrounded by the others or I'd zat the bastard," Carter said angrily.

"Zat him anyway," Lawrence said standing just a little way off, his P90 extended towards the crowd of villagers.

"What?"

"So a few of them go down with him. They'll get up again."

Sam grinned at the major and took out her zat and aimed at the Shaman. Her shot hit about three others too and the four of them dropped. A couple of others were caught in the nimbus and doubled over in pain. The shock of their Shaman going down silenced the entire crowd.

"Now we go," Teal'c stated picking up the colonel.

Lieutenant Barber ran forward and helped Janet with Daniel who was still unsteady and obviously in pain.

Sam took point with Teal'c close on her heels with Janet and Barber bringing Daniel. Lawrence and the rest of SG5 covered the retreat. Running ahead Sam dialled the co-ordinates for the SGC and as soon as Teal'c and the others arrived with Daniel and Jack she sent the GDO code.

A few natives were following but the majority of them were still gathered around the fallen Shaman. Lawrence though was not prepared to relax his guard; he had long since learned that the last minute of a mission could be the most dangerous.

Sam stood guard by the Gate as Janet and Lieutenant Barber helped Daniel through, Teal'c carrying Jack right behind them.

Sam shouted to Major Lawrence as soon as the others had passed through the event horizon and SG5 quickly pulled back to the Gate. Lawrence nodded to Carter and she slipped through to find Jack and Daniel both already being loaded onto waiting gurneys.

Hammond, on not receiving any communication other than the GDO code, had enough experience with SG1 to assume the possible need for medical care and had called for it as soon as he knew they were coming back. While there hadn't been a set time scale for this particular mission, so it couldn't be said they were arriving back early, the General had had misgivings about this mission all along.

Sam hurried over to her colleagues and was pleased to see that Daniel, at least, had recovered. He was already talking to Janet.

"...I know but I can only assume it was because as soon as I went through the Gate the chanting was cut off. I don't understand how but the sound the Shaman was making had some kind of direct effect on my brain. It was as if someone was continually ...you know that awful sound when someone drags their nails over a chalkboard," he shivered, "it was like that only inside my head and I could _feel_ it. And then at the end when he let out the piercing note, it was like a spike being driven in. I never want to go through that again."

"Go through what," a hoarse voice asked.

"Jack?"

"I think so but just now I'm not sure I wanna be. God, Doc, what did you give me?"

"Be grateful, Jack. Whatever you feel like it's better than what I went through," Daniel said with a rueful grin.

"How are you feeling now, colonel?" Hammond asked, sparing a swift glance for the doctor.

"Like someone has set up a blacksmith's anvil in my head," he grouched.

"Are you aware of any feelings of anger towards Daniel?" Janet Fraiser asked carefully.

"No. What happened?" He glanced over at Daniel. "Did you get him to take it away, whatever the hell _it_ is?"

"I'm afraid not. He refused, apparently we deserve the wrath of his deity," Daniel's anger was obvious.

Jack sagged, physically and emotionally.

"We did retrieve the Osala, O'Neill," said Teal'c, holding up the gourd.

"Osala?" Hammond queried.

"It's the drink they gave us. It was the best we could do and thanks Teal'c for the quick thinking," Daniel added.

"I want you two in the infirmary," both men opened their mouths at the same time to protest but with long years of experience with these two, her worst patients, the Doc continued, "and I'll brook no argument on this, gentlemen."

Jack glanced at Daniel and shrugged.

"What of their proximity, Dr. Fraiser?" Hammond asked.

"I will separate them as far as I am able in the infirmary, though I expect that I'll be able to discharge Daniel shortly though I want him to stay on base. I'll keep the colonel under closer observation.

Jack groaned at that but knew better than to protest.

Daniel didn't care where he was as long as Jack was safe. He just prayed that Janet and her staff would be able to help them now they had the Osala.

"And this, what did you call it Dr. Jackson?"

"Osala, sir. I'm pretty sure there was also some kind of mental or at least emotional control that the Shaman perpetuated but that seems to have faded since we passed through the Gate. Whether that worked in conjunction with this stuff I don't know but I suspect this is the source of the enzyme."

"Yes, that's the impression I have as well," Janet Fraiser said, pulling the stopper from the neck of the gourd. "Wow, it certainly smells very fruity. Actually I wonder if this is like a cordial and they needed to add water."

"Possibly but what they gave us was pretty thick," Sam commented with a frown. "Let me have a whiff, maybe I'll recognise the odour." She sniffed the gourd carefully and pulled back with surprise. "Ooh, that does smell strong. Damn, the thing is I can't be certain if it's any different from what I drank."

"It doesn't really matter," Janet said putting the stopper back in. "But what the lab discovers is," she added thoughtfully. Giving herself a mental shake she said to the orderlies, "Let's get them to the infirmary," and they quickly wheeled the gurneys out of the Gateroom with the other half of SG1 and the general following.

* * *

Daniel paced the small space behind his desk. He was as frustrated as he could ever remember being. He'd just had a telephone conversation with Jack two floors above in his VIP suite and talking in code was becoming more and more difficult when the things they wanted to say... _damn I don't know how much of this I can take, as for Jack he's been climbing the walls for almost two weeks_.

Janet and her team of medical technicians had been working the clock round for over three weeks and they were no nearer solving the problem and even the ever-optimistic Janet Fraiser was finally beginning to admit they might never find it. Jack had mentioned again last evening that he'd retire and move away and allow Daniel to carry on working at the mountain. They'd had their first 'normal' argument over that since this whole fiasco had started as Jack refused to believe that Daniel had no wish to remain working at the SGC without him.

Most of what Jack said was true of course, that Daniel loved the job, that he had friends, even a family in the SGC and that balanced out the danger he faced daily. What Jack couldn't seem to grasp was that the whole apple cart was unbalanced without him. He may have friends and yes, a family that he loved but he had an even closer relationship with Jack and nothing else mattered without that. He couldn't walk the corridors, work in his office or watch the Gate as it whirred on its axis knowing Jack wasn't there too.

Of course, it was also true that the reason Jack planned to retire was because they could no longer be together so what would be the point of Daniel leaving too? Daniel told Jack if they couldn't be together at the SGC they would be separate away from it. Daniel planned to go and bury himself working at a dig somewhere, anywhere.

Jack begged him not to, to stay with his friends. Daniel understood what he asked and why but he couldn't bear the idea of being with them when Jack would be so alone.

* * *

Jack lay on the bed arm flung over his eyes reliving his recent conversation with Daniel, not the words exactly but the underlying meaning. While it was good talking to Daniel it also underlined the frustration and longing reminding him how long it'd been since they'd been physically close making the desire slam through him to _do_ something. Not for the first time he unfastened his pants and began leisurely to jerk off. Imagining Daniel in his mind's eye he soon came explosively but instead of feeling relieved and satisfied he only felt disappointed and cheated.

His imagination could conjure up images and memories but he couldn't _feel_ Daniel. He needed to touch and be touched. Talking over the phone was one thing but he longed to see Daniel's eyes as they spoke, the little wrinkle in his nose when he frowned or even more rare when he smiled. More than anything at that moment he longed to see the way his lover scrunched his face up and then his eyes would snap open wide, staring as he came. That was the expression only Jack saw and he despaired of ever seeing it again.

Janet performed a few proximity tests with them during the last three weeks as part of the investigations into the substance called Osala. As if things hadn't been bad enough before, it now appeared Jack's 'condition', for want of a better word, had deteriorated even further so that he could hardly spend five minutes in Daniel's presence before his anger began to take over his reason. The possibility of spending any time at all in the company of the man he loved no longer existed. He felt tears prick at his eyes. The idea of facing the rest of his life without Daniel was a pain he thought he'd never have to face again and he wondered if he could do it.

It also hurt that he couldn't persuade Daniel to stay at the SGC if, when Janet finally admitted she had failed. He thought that at least he could leave Daniel in good hands with people they both trusted doing a job he loved and he laughed to himself, Daniel Jackson, the most stubborn man he'd ever met. Why was he surprised that this time was no different than any other and when that one constant in his life, Daniel, was so stubborn. The laughter died as he realised he should have known; after all _this_ was the man he loved.

And lost.

The shrill ring of the phone disturbed his wallowing self-pity and irritably he picked up. "O'Neill."

"Colonel, would you go to the Iso Lab please?"

"Doc, I don't wanna waste any more time yelling at Daniel. It doesn't do any good to either of us."

"Colonel, Jack I think, I hope we might be onto something."

"Janet?" he felt his heart pounding in his chest. _God, let her be onto something this time._ "I'm on my way."

* * *

With so much riding on this his heart was in his mouth as Daniel entered the Iso Lab. Jack was leaning against the opposite wall, hands in pockets, ankles crossed, eyes cast down. To Daniel he looked like a boy who'd been told he couldn't go out and play with his friends and for a moment Daniel's gut clenched at the comparison that scenario brought to his mind in their present circumstances.

Then Jack looked up and smiled at him and fear was replaced with hope.

Janet told them the breakthrough had come just when she was on the verge of admitting it could take years, if ever, to solve the quandary. It had been the use of the Osala on Teal'c and Carter that had been both the stumbling block and the solution. They were apparently totally unaffected by the enzyme and yet it had showed up just as clearly in their original samples as it had in Jack and Daniel's. Bearing in mind her simile of opposing magnetic forces affecting them, the lack of any effect at all on the others was extremely puzzling. It was only after Janet's exhaustive questioning of Teal'c and Sam that Janet finally realised that they _had_ been affected though not in the way anyone could have expected. Metaphorically speaking they cancelled each other out in that Sam supported Daniel and Teal'c supported Jack around the time of their arguments. Sometimes the support was voiced and other times it wasn't but it _was_ there.

At first Janet found this interesting but not particularly useful and almost as a last resort she instructed her staff to run more and yet more tests, comparing, cross-matching until finally just one more titration threw up a mismatched solution. At first it was thought to be an error, till it was checked and re-checked. Doc Fraiser almost yelled eureka when she realised they'd found it. It had been there the whole damned time. The blood from Sam and Teal'c would, hopefully, act as an antidote.

There was only one way to find out.

Jack had readily submitted and she had injected him with the solution about four hours earlier.

Now for the final test...

Daniel stood just inside the door feeling warmed by the smile of his lover, hoping that the fears of only a few hours ago could be burned away by the touch of his hand.

The last time he'd entered this room with Jack had been about twenty hours ago and that time he'd fled with Jack's condemnation ringing in his ears. He'd only stayed in the room for about ten minutes.

Daniel stood for a couple of minutes just watching, waiting as did Jack across the room. Then Jack moved and Daniel tensed but he merely moved one of the chairs and sat down. Daniel sat in the other chair trying to relax but his nerves were twanging. He could see the clock high on the wall above through the glass walls of the Iso Lab, the second hand moving so slowly it almost appeared to have stopped.

"Daniel?"

The quiet voice made him jump for a split-second in fear, fear that Jack was losing, fear that the anger was beginning, before he realised the gentleness of the tone.

"Stop watching the clock, it doesn't help, I know," Jack smiled and Daniel couldn't help but smile back, relief washing through him.

He sat back taking a few deep breaths trying to relax. He looked over at Jack to find the older man watching him.

"You're feeling all right, Jack?" he asked nervous and hopeful.

"Yep."

"Kinda nervous," Jack added with a rueful grin.

They sat again for a couple of minutes, both fidgeting nervously.

"Daniel, tell me a story."

"You hate my myths, my fairy tales," Daniel laughed.

Jack pulled his chair closer and said gently, "I know but I want to hear your voice. I think, _I pray_ everything will work out but if it goes wrong I want one last memory. The one I _really_ want," he smiled, that special smile that melted Daniel's bones, "I can't have, so instead I want to hear your voice, hear your passion." Jack leaned even closer and whispered, "You have two passions Daniel, your work and me, if I can't have one passion I'll take the other."

As he finished speaking his face was so close to Daniel's that the younger man drew in a breath. He almost felt as if Jack had kissed him.

"My...first passion is so...overwhelming just now Jack, I can't think of anything to say," he breathed.

Jack sat back with a self-satisfied grin.

"Is this a new version of torture, Jack?" Daniel said with a laugh.

Jack barked out a laugh. "Oh, Danny, Danny, I have so many kinds of torture I'd like to try on you."

* * *

Janet was monitoring from the observation booth with General Hammond, Sam and Teal'c in attendance. Again she had muted the volume, it wasn't necessary to hear the actual words spoken to know if the colonel was becoming angry.

They'd been inside the Iso Lab now for almost fifteen minutes and after the first few minutes of nerves and obvious stilted conversation they had relaxed into sitting close to each other talking and more recently laughing together.

"How long has it been now, doctor?" Hammond asked leaning closer to the monitor.

"That's seventeen minutes now sir, well past the danger zone of the last three attempts at this. However, we need much longer to be sure of anything. "

"It looks promising, doesn't it, Janet?" Sam asked, hoping that at last they'd managed to find a cure for her two friends. They didn't deserve this. On a more personal note Sam also hoped that this would end the talk of one or both of them leaving the SGC. The colonel had spoken to Teal'c and her asking that they look after Daniel if he had to retire and she'd been sad at the thought of losing the man who was more than just her CO; he was a friend. As if that wasn't bad enough Daniel had then told them that if Jack had to retire he couldn't stay on at the SGC without him and that he too would be leaving. The whole thing left her feeling sick.

If this were a cure, it would be a cure for them all.

* * *

Jack approached the door to Daniel's apartment with a mixture of nerves and trepidation. It seemed so long since they had been alone together, really alone not like a pair of lab rats being watched in the Iso Lab.

It had been three days since Jack had even seen Daniel. It had taken longer to finally rid Jack's body of the effects of the enzyme and Janet Fraiser had ordered Daniel home three days earlier. He'd wanted to stay on base even though his body was back to normal and he did his best to persuade the doctor that he felt fine. However, she told him that after weeks of stress he needed to go home and relax and she interrupted his planned argument that he could relax just as well on base knowing that Jack was well on the road to recovery. She told him in no uncertain terms that if he didn't go home of his own free will she would get the General to send him home under armed guard with strict instructions he was not to be allowed back on base until Hammond countermanded the order.

With his tail somewhat between his legs Daniel retreated to his apartment. Now at last Jack could follow. He hadn't warned Daniel he was coming; he wanted to surprise his friend. Now he was having second thoughts, perhaps he ought to have warned him. Then he thought back to the last telephone conversation they'd had the night before. As usual they couldn't say too much as Jack was in the main infirmary by now and two members of SG7 had been injured the day before and needed constant nursing care. It didn't really matter though because what they could say was enough to make Jack's heart beat a little faster and his groin a definite interest, which was something of a nuisance when he could do little but wish his growing erection down. Daniel had signed off by telling Jack he could hardly wait for the day they could share dinner before watching hockey on TV. The fact that Daniel's voice dropped two octaves and Jack was well aware that watching hockey on TV used to involve a gratuitous amount of kissing and groping rapidly swelled his erection again. Jack growled down the phone at him and Daniel laughed; a sound Jack would never tire of hearing.

Smiling at his memories Jack lifted his hand to knock.

Inside Daniel was collapsed on the sofa with his personal journal. He was reading some of the entries he'd made earlier in the year just after he and Jack had returned for the first time from their secret hideaway in the mountains. Everything had been so wonderful then and all he wanted now was to turn the clock back, not literally of course. Daniel firmly believed that each step in a person's life taught its own unique lesson; even the hard times could have some positive effect. Daniel felt perhaps the pain of the last few weeks could make their relationship stronger like metal after it has been tempered. No, all he wanted was for Jack and him to get back to where they'd been for that short holiday that now seemed only a dream. He felt the need to read his journal, to see what his thoughts had been at that time. _Remind myself how safe and secure I felt in my love for Jack and his for me._

The knock at his door wasn't particularly welcome just then. He considered not answering but his innate politeness won out and he pulled himself from the sofa and slowly made his way to the door.

He pulled it open and when he saw Jack standing there with a lop-sided grin on his face he simply froze for a second. Then he grabbed the other man and almost pulled him off his feet in his haste to yank him inside the door. Using his foot he slammed the door shut as he enveloped the older man in a bear hug, revelling in the simple act of touch he snuggled up against Jack's neck where he murmured against the skin, "Oh, Jack why didn't you let me know you were coming?"

Sighing at the freedom of finally wrapping his arms around the younger man and pulling him as close as he could without actually climbing inside his skin, Jack replied, "This, this is why. My Danny in full flight. Oh god, I've dreamed of this. Having you in my arms again, smelling your scent, feeling your body against mine, your heart beating faster and faster just because I'm with you. Oh, Daniel I've missed you so much."

Daniel just sighed, pulling back to look into Jack's eyes, revelling in the expression he saw there. It wasn't often Jack was so eloquent and Daniel could think of only one way to answer him. Leaning in to capture the full mouth, keeping his eyes on Jack's until his emotion forced him to close them as he sank into the feeling of finally kissing his love again. There wasn't anything else in the world like this as his feelings took over any conscious thought. He could hear his own heart beat, feel the blood as it burned its way through his veins flowing south to heat his groin and turn his legs to jello.

They gasped as they finally broke apart staring at each other before both breaking into inane grins. Jack lifted a finger to trace from the inside of Daniel's eye, down his nose to his mouth where he traced the lower lip until Daniel sucked the digit inside. Jack sighed and leaned his forehead to Daniel's.

"Bed, Daniel?" he asked softly.

"Oh, yes please, unless you'd like a shower first," he grinned.

Jack laughed, Daniel liked showers and who was he to deny him pleasure.

They moved across the apartment slowly, interrupted almost constantly by the need to touch, to kiss; to confirm the other man was actually there. The dreams and the nightmares at last were over. Finally they reached the bathroom and Daniel pushed the door open and walked inside. He leaned back against the washbasin and just looked at Jack.

"What?" the silver haired man asked with a grin, he didn't really need to ask but he wanted to hear Daniel say it.

"Want to watch," the younger man grinned.

Having left his jacket on the back of the sofa on the way to the bathroom, Jack was only wearing a dark green shirt which he slowly unbuttoned before slipping if off his shoulders to let it slide down his arms to pool on the floor at his feet. Just the expression on Daniel's face was enough for his nipples to harden. He then moved his hands to the belt of his jeans, which he took his time unbuckling as he waited for Daniel to lick his lips as he knew he would. When the tongue snaked out to swipe at Daniel's lower lip Jack laughed and moved on to unsnap the jeans.

Daniel pushed off from the sink and took a step closer. Just when Jack thought he was going to kiss him, Daniel laughed and stepped sideways to turn on the shower instead. He turned back to see Jack slipping his boxers down his long legs and out came the tongue again.

Jack wanted that tongue in his mouth and moved swiftly forward to gather Daniel in his embrace. Then the dam broke and suddenly hands were everywhere stoking the already raging fire with lips on nipples, necks and finally lips on lips. Daniel pulled back gasping for breath and control. Looking into his eyes all the while, Jack slowly reached forward and pulled the dark blue tee over Daniel's head caressing his back as he slid his hands down to his lover's waist. Running his fingers along the inside the waistband of Daniel's jeans, Jack reached for and undid the button. Breaking eye contact Jack looked down as he unzipped Daniel's jeans and smiled to see the younger man had gone commando.

"Expecting company?" he asked huskily.

"Actually no, thought I might have to entertain myself later," Daniel grinned.

"Not now I'm here," Jack growled, pleased when Daniel's cock jumped under his touch.

Hurriedly kicking off his jeans, Daniel took Jack's hand they slipped under the warm water and he moved in to kiss Jack as they did so. Passion took hold of both men and the kiss that began as a gentle exploration, became a duel of tongues and a pressure of bodies pushing ever closer. Jack's hand drew ever-increasing circles on Daniel's back until his fingers drifted over the cleft in his ass where he rested them. His free hand had been caressing Daniel's neck and shoulder and now it moved down his chest and lazily played across the flat belly before, amidst moans and squirming, Jack caressed Daniel's cock for the first time in a long while.

"Please Jack; don't make me wait any longer. I need you so much. I want to feel you, inside and out. I need to know you really are here with me, that I'm not dreaming any longer."

Jack caressed Daniel's ass and pulled him closer so the younger man's cock slid against his. "I'm real Danny, feel me. I'm never going anywhere, ever again. Unless you send me away," Jack added softly.

"Send you away?" he asked disbelieving. Daniel grabbed hold of him one hand either side of his head and pulled him in for a searing kiss. "You'll never be rid of me. Make love to me Jack. Make me remember."

He didn't need to be asked twice. Kissing his way down Daniel's body, Jack nipped at his shoulders and laved his nipples, laying a trail down his ribs and across his belly. Daniel was lost in a world of sensation and yet he wanted more, _needed_ more. He pressed his groin against Jack's and rubbed himself against the hardness of the older man, grinning when Jack gasped and pushed him back against the tiles of the cubicle. Jack took hold of Daniel's hands and lifted them above his head holding them there with one hand while his other hand went straight for his lover's cock. He stroked and pulled twisting just a little, fingering the slit and coating his fingers with the pre-come as the water pounded down between them.

Letting go of Daniel's hands knowing the younger man would keep them aloft, Jack slid down to his knees. Watching his lover slide down his body Daniel enjoyed the view, watching as the water droplets hit Jack's velvety skin, cascading down his broad back and running over his ass to trickle between his cleft and onto the tiles below. The younger man licked his lips imagining his tongue following that same path later. Jack suddenly looked up at him and grinned knowing what was going to happen as Daniel's breath quickened in anticipation. He'd missed this so much, this physical expression of the love they shared. He'd forgotten, he'd actually forgotten how wonderful Jack could make him feel, how alive. How very lucky he was that this man had fallen for him. Jack's hand was still doing marvellous things to his body and he knew it was only going to get better.

Suddenly Daniel felt his cock engulfed in a wet warmth and he arched into the sensation thrusting into Jack's mouth so he almost gagged. Jack pressed a hand on Daniel's belly controlling his movement as he nipped the head of Daniel's cock before taking him in to the root. Daniel shivered and unconsciously tried to buck again. Jack was overwhelmed that he could do that to this man; make him lose control so completely. He began to pull back sucking as he went and then licking his way down as his mouth slid back taking him in again.

His free hand cupped and massaged Daniel's balls before slipping behind to caress the perineum on his way to massage the ring of muscle around Daniel's entrance. His fingers worked gently to open Daniel up. Obviously it had been a little while since he'd taken Daniel like this and he would need some lubrication. He reached up for the small bottle and poured a little onto his fingers and went back to his gentle massage, returning Daniel to his mouth again, kissing, licking and sucking.

Daniel knew he was close, the twin sensations of Jack's mouth on his cock and his fingers inside were slowly driving him insane and he loved it. _God, I missed this, missed this so mu......_ "Ahhhh, Jack!"

_That's my boy, knew that'd get you._ "Yes, Danny?" he asked innocently as he pulled back.

"Do that again!"

"My pleasure, or should I say your pleasure," the older man grinned, swooping back to take him in again this time swallowing him whole in one movement. Daniel's cock hit the back of Jack's throat and he sucked for all he was worth. Jack again brushed Daniel's prostate with his fingers and with a shout Daniel came, wave after wave pouring down Jack's throat as he swallowed as quickly as he could.

Daniel's entire body shook as the power of his orgasm surprised him with its intensity.

"Oh, Jack, Jack," he gasped. "I love you!"

"Backatcha, Danny," he replied softly. "Ready for me?" Jack was as hard as nails. Seeing Daniel orgasm like that sent desire slamming through him anew. As Danny nodded Jack quickly slicked himself up.

He turned Daniel around, the younger man pliant to his bidding. Daniel automatically put his hands out to support himself and braced his legs well apart. He looked over his shoulder and gave Jack a blinding smile that went straight to Jack's heart.

"Aw, Danny, what you do to me. I've wanted to do this to you," he hesitated smiling to himself. "Remember that first test with that Osala stuff, when I said I'd take your second passion 'cause I couldn't have what I really wanted?"

"I know Jack, I always knew. Whichever of us takes the other we become one; that was what you wanted."

"That was what I wanted," he replied softly.

"Then make us one," Daniel breathed.

Jack pushed one finger in again and quickly added a second, twisting and stretching wanting to make sure Danny was ready for him.

Daniel leaned his head against his right arm as it stretched above him taking his weight, panting through the sensation; "Now Jack, I'm ready, want you now."

"Just a moment, Danny. It's been a while, don't wanna hurt ya."

"Don't care, wanna feel."

"All right, love," Jack murmured as he positioned himself, slowly pushing in. "Relax for me."

Daniel wanted this yet suddenly he was tense. Jack stopped, waiting.

Daniel took a deep breath as Jack was softly saying, "Relax, it's only me. Let me in, let me make us one." One more breath and his muscles relaxed and Jack moved slowly until he was all the way in.

Daniel sighed at the feeling of being filled by his lover. "Well, is that it, or you gonna move?"

Jack grunted and pulled nearly all the way out before sliding back in canting his hips slightly for a better angle.

"Again, Jack again," gasped Daniel as Jack found his prostate.

Jack began a steady rhythm then nearly all the way out slowly, pounding back in to brush the prostate every time. Daniel was writhing and moaning thrusting back to meet Jack time and again and the sounds he made were echoing inside Jack's mind. He was giving the man he loved such feelings, such pleasure and that knowledge alone was enough to give Jack joy. The water was running over both of them dancing off the overheated skin but neither man felt it as all sensation was centred inside as the orgasm began to gather and race through each man. Jack sensed how close Daniel was again and he reached quickly round to grasp the younger man's cock and pump it to match his own thrusts inside his lover's body. Jack's legs were shaking with the effort, one arm wrapped around Daniel's chest for support as he pounded in again and again. Daniel was hardly aware of anything except for the amazing feeling blazing along his nerve endings to explode from his body with a yell of joy.

Daniel screaming his name triggered Jack's release and he answered his lover's cry with one of his own, filling Daniel with his come before he collapsed against the younger man's back the water covering them both with its mist.

"Oh, god Jack that was simply amazing. I feel ...god I don't know what I feel."

"I feel you and that's all I need." Jack was suddenly embarrassed at his uncharacteristic sappiness. "Except that I need a towel, the water's getting chilly!"

Daniel laughed and extricating himself grabbed a couple of towels, throwing one to Jack.

* * *

As they dried each other slowly, taking little kisses and nips along the way, Jack debated if he should ask. Would it only stir up bad memories that were best forgotten? Was it better for Daniel just to forget, was it perhaps himself he was concerned with? Wasn't it better to face it and chase it away, or replace it?

"Daniel?" he said tentatively.

"Yes, love," he replied dreamily.

Still rubbing the towel over Daniel's back, a little hesitantly Jack asked, "Danny, will you come back to my place?" Daniel stiffened in his arms and Jack closed his eyes for a moment. "I know how you must feel after what I did ...to...you there," Jack said his voice cracking, "but I can't bear the idea of going back there with that memory soiling everything." Daniel turned in his arms looking up at Jack, seeing the pain in the chocolate brown eyes. "I ...can you...will you help me make some new memories?"

"Oh, Jack, you know I don't blame you for that any more." Daniel reached up and brushed the backs of his fingers along Jack's cheek and the older man leaned into the caress. "I'll go anywhere you want." Closing the distance, their lips met in a chaste kiss.

"Jack, do you want to know what I was doing when you arrived here?" Jack frowned a little, puzzled. "I was reading my journal, my personal journal, about the time we spent at the cabin in the mountains; our little hideaway. I wanted to remember how wonderful we were; we are together. Nothing can ever change that.

"And Jack, I'll never walk out again. I promise."

Jack closed his eyes and felt his world had finally fallen back in place. "I don't know what the hell I ever did to deserve you but I promise you that I'll spend the rest of my life trying to live up to it."

* * *

Daniel lay curled up in Jack's bed his head on his chest, listening to the older man's steady heartbeat as he slept. They were both sated after a night of making love, reacquainting themselves with each other's body. Jack had wanted to create new memories and they'd certainly done that. They'd started in the living room on the carpet erasing that memory before creating another one in the kitchen, finally retiring to the bedroom.

Everything was as it should be again and with a smile Daniel let sleep take him.

FIN


End file.
